My boyfriend wants to hide that we are dating cause he’s white and I’m black

So I got my first ask toi question today and let me just say I’m so excited. 

So you want to go to dinner with your boo who is white and you are black and your man doesn’t want his parents to know he’s swirlin.  Well my advice is simple it’s hard to hide love and this is a  red flag.  Any man that is willing to hide you isn’t ready for a real relationship.

Yes I know that there are cultural differences that we just can’t ignore but love is love. 

You need to have a real sit down and let your man know that you aren’t willing to hide your love because your man’s parents may not accept.  Times have changed and yes racism still exists but if he wants you he will flaunt you its that simple.

If he’s unwilling to have an adult conversation about the issue then you have to consider especially since you say that you two spoke about marriage that he may not be the one.  Parents can be hard critics no doubt but you need someone who is willing to go the distance.

He needs to have a conversation with his parents and do it now.  No need to make holiday plans to have drama at the dinner table.  He has to understand is that if his parents love him they will attempt to get to know the lady that makes him happy and learn to look past the color lines. 

Honestly some people are just set in their ways but it may work out to where he will make his stand and the two of you through time will be able to make this work.  It could also turn out that the relationship will end and the only ones to know that is the two of you.

My biggest suggestion is not to take to heart what they are thinking as much as you need to make this about you and him.  He is the one that doesn’t want to speak up.  Don’t go to him being critical about his parents belief in my opinion.  Yes just because he’s nervous about the meeting doesn’t make them racist it could be that they have never had anyone in their circle date outside their race.  You can’t make that a racial issue until you meet them and they tell you or treat you indifferent due to your color.

Have the discussion and be clear your intentions and let him make the decision to be the man you have grown to love or not.

Disclaimer: any questions can be submitted to me via email at and all identity will be changed to protect you and parties involved

Toitime a place for empowerment-hurry back!


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