Ask Toi: My husband tells me I’m fat and wants me to lose weight

Good morning.  Here’s another ask Toi. 

So your husband has said the phrase that every woman cringes – he’s called you fat.

I don’t know the tone but for a man to say those words unless he’s a prick I’m going to assume he loves you and is looking out for you.  Men can be ignorant no doubt but to the woman they love and married seems as a stretch to be so extra. 

Lets explore this as a woman you know we hate to hear of such phrases.  It messes with the ego it’s a huge blow especially from someone you love and admire.

Lets take a moment from emotion and really think about this.

Has your actual weight gone up?  I know it’s hard to think about but be subjective.   What are the reasons for your weight gain?  Sometimes new things in life causes us to be relaxed and therefore picking up weight is inevitable. 

Once you figure out your why it will be much easier to deal with going forward.
What is your thought behind what your husband said?  Are you willing to allow him to be able to speak into you for change or use it only as a way to be defeated and upset without change.  Yes change no doubt is hard but necessary. 

So yes be pricked but don’t stay that way too long.  Take that and make your changes.  You have to be comfortable in your skin and happy as well.  You want to be able to feel as sexy and beautiful as you want to be. 

Don’t give your husband too much side eye.  Look at him and say to him (only if you know he’s trying to help) thank you for your feedback and I’ll be working on it.  Then get up and work it out.  I was a size 2 most of my adult life until I had kids and obviously I can’t and don’t want to go back to that size but I can be my fabulous size at 10 and appreciate my new curves. 

Hope that helps!

Toitime a place for empowerment-hurry back!

2 thoughts on “Ask Toi: My husband tells me I’m fat and wants me to lose weight

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