Insecurity or protective?

Alright jewels I pray you are enjoying your day today. We as women have a gambit of things to work on and work through.  Is it insecure for you as a married woman to check a single woman who you think is being flirtatious with your husband?

I’ve heard all the arguments.  It has been said that a woman should always check her man and make her man respect his wife in the presence of other females.  I’ve also heard about the over emotional women who as soon as someone smiles at their man wants to either check their man or the woman or both.  What is the correct response? 

When you marry if you have had good marriage counseling they tell you to make your bond strong.  Does that mean that men’s eyes turn blind to attractive women?  Short answer is of course not no.  The man who truly adores his wife can’t help when an equally attractive woman walks past.  Should that man be said he’s cheating on his wife? 

My thing is this and I’ve said this before.  You shouldn’t have to make your mate respect you.  Your mate should love you like he loves himself.  Asking him to respect you is asking him to respect himself.  Women like to throw in what if the tables were turned, but a man who really loves you won’t even need to be persuaded.  A man glancing at another woman and admiring her beauty and moving along should be nothing more than a look.  If you’re man is following a woman with his eyes, stopping to hold your hand to stare than again he knows better and doesn’t care and you got other issues.

Women and men have insecurities.  I think what puts women on the radar is how we are known to respond because of them.  Yes when you love you love hard but that’s no excuse to act out of character for any man.  My insecurities or my own personal issues with my body image doesn’t excuse me to behave badly with anyone.

I personally always think a conversation with your man if you felt that he’s being too close to another female should be first especially if you’re married.  Don’t make it about the other woman.  I know ladies some are rolling the eyes because you ready to set it off with the cutie from the third floor at your man’s job, but pump your breaks. 

If you find yourself having issues and going to speak to a woman, stay classy.  Any woman worth her weight will know how to get that point across without having to curse, raise a voice, or go to blows.  It’s all in how you handle yourself.  No man is worth my character.  Let me repeat that NO man is worth my character. 

Ladies another thing is don’t stoop to the Internet wars either.  You know what I’m talking about.  That moment when you stalk that woman’s page on all social media and make fake pages.  It’s not worth it. 

If you really do have insecurities that clogs your ability to see things clearly, do me a favor.  Get help.  Often times we push our issues on others and don’t deal with them.  It’s getting warmer if you think you need to lose some pounds – lose them but not to keep a man but to make you feel good.  If you want to change your looks for you I say do it. Sexiness and confidence is a turn on and it has nothing to do with heels, low cut shirts or thigh high boots.

Lastly if you’re married deal with your marriage and it’s issues.  Don’t bring anything or anyone else into that.  Lord knows it’s hard to work on a marriage without added distractions.  I’ll leave you with one more thing like my mom would say, “you can’t hold a man’s penis in your hands all day.”  Momma always and still tells it like it is.  Stop trying to make him not cheat.  Do what you supposed to do if he cheats it’s his issue not yours and act accordingly. 

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