Kept Woman: What is that all about?

So I’m on my way to work and and with any job you can imagine the conversations that are had.  So a young lady tells me she’s not a kept woman because she’s never had a job.  As you can imagine my face goes blank.

I ask her what her definition of a kept woman is and she proceeds to tell me that it’s about a woman who works.  I say we’ll not actually that’s the opposite.  I proceed to tell her a kept woman usually is one who is available for a man, lives lavishly and is usually a mistress or a whore who is available when a man wants sex.  She looks puzzled.

I said okay well let me give you another definition it’s almost like a gold digger she gives her body in exchange for gifts.  She says now that I can accept.  My thing that we talk about is how a kept woman is definitely glorified.  I’m not suggesting that all women who don’t have talent but find their way to a wealthy man is a kept woman, but I do know that many are personified in that way.

In light of her bringing up this topic I bring up the excerpt that Tina Knowles Lawson or known to many as Beyonce’s mom states that she’s never been kept and lists the many things she’s has done over the years for herself and her family in her article in Ebony.  Working with the young lady’s definition Ms. Tenia B wouldn’t work. 

But back to the actual definition I think society makes the kept woman the goal.  There are many women who want to be chose by high priced men and live this life where they don’t cook or clean, they don’t work, they just have the best of everything and become eye candy.  It’s the hard working women who don’t have the fortitude of having someone paying them to do the things they do that don’t get the shine.

So the young lady asked is a stay at home mom who doesn’t work and her husband pays for everything the same thing?  I told her not in my book.  Having your husband cover you isn’t the same.  If you as a wife have agreed to stay at home especially raising a child isn’t the same as being a man’s sex object by giving your body in exchange for a cushioned lifestyle.  Sex should be a part of a healthy lifestyle and marriage. Now I could be biased as I’ve been a stay at home mom.  By cover I mean that a husband is the head of the household and being the provider.

Many wives even the stay at home moms are changing what it means to be a stay at home wife. Many have small businesses on the side.  Some find little ways to bring in an income by selling or offering services like baking, etc that they do from home.  Being a kept woman has to be a lonely life. That man has to be in my mind cheating with you and therefore with his wife for the major holidays.  A kept woman even if both the man and woman are single in my mind have many women he wines and dines and take care of in different parts of the world.  A kept woman in my mind is the woman who has to put more than her body on the line in order to secure her lifestyle.

That’s why they have websites like sugar daddy, etc.  Women are looking for a quick fix and practically selling sex to get it in a borderline prostitute type of way.  I for one would rather work hard even if I fail at a goal then constantly having to live up to this over sexed persona to stay on top. 

If there’s any keeping that needs to be going on let it be to keep pursuing my goals by hard work, keep my bills paid and the debt low, keep my mind focused and my drama low.  That’s the only kept that I need to hear. 



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