Leave my tantrums alone!

Now I know my many mommy readers will find solice today.  I have little people like the type of little people who have many tantrums at any given times.  As a mom I try to stay prepared for these outburst by cutting down on the things that will trigger them like no naps, boredom, and feeding frenzies.

Now as an adult who prepares for our tantrums?  I know there will be someone saying I don’t have them I’m an adult and I just know how to navigate my feelings appropriately.  My response to that is how cute but if we followed you home where you could be your real true self I’m sure we would find that to not always be the truth.  A tantrum is an emotional outburst so if you want to live in LA LA land as if you don’t have them then you’re sadly mistaken.  We all have them so call them what you would like.

The point is if you’re a parent we prepare for them but as adults we dont.  The key when you’re with your kids is to minimize them not act like they don’t exist.  With little people they have no filter so they just respond.  Some adults don’t grow out of that way of handling things either.  You can just respond and blow up all the time.  I’ve heard so many people say often it’s just their personality.  No that’s who you really are by saying personality we take it off of us like it’s a disease that can be cured.

Adult tantrums are far worst than a screaming child because as you get older you learn ways to manipulate others as well as buttons to push to get the response you want.  You feel good at the end of the day but reality you end up losing way more than you bargain.  Think about the one friend you have and we all have them where as soon as something happens they go off, never ask questions and always ready to “pop” off.  Those friends are great if you in a fight but they are the ones who usually don’t have bail money or attorney to get you or them out of a tight situation.  So that friend you can’t always bring in mixed situations.

Tantrums ruin relationships too.  Mates get tired of having to make excuses for your behavior.  You’re mad and now the world must pay for your behavior.  I always thought if a mate can’t handle your stuff maybe they aren’t the one. There’s truths and myths to this thinking.  A mate shouldn’t have to keep putting up with your bad behavior but it works both ways. 

We are supposed to strive to be better versions of ourselves not make up excuses to be more of the negative parts.  We know we aren’t right.  Sorry don’t always fix things either.  You can’t say sorry to cover hurts, name calling, disrespectful behavior, etc. We have to own our stuff.  Now that doesn’t mean that all emotions are bad.  No one is asking you to walk around like nothing bothers you.  What we are talking about is outburst you know cursing others out, emotional silent treatments, yelling at others including partners, violence, etc. 

Emotions are healthy.  We are human we experience emotional roller coasters often.  It’s not okay to give others hell because something isn’t going our way, or we are upset or hurt.  We have to just like with our children find better ways of handling our emotions.

So no ma’am or sir when your tantrums affect others around you, when people are walking on egg shells to not tip you off, or wanting to be around you less than Houston we have a problem.  Take responsibility for your actions and make a change.  Take each moment one at a time.  Just like parents have to prepare for kids tantrums, you do the same.  Stay away from elements of things or people who make you act out.  If you can’t handle something be honest with those around you.  They will appreciate it more than getting kicked out of places or you ruining trips and experiences for others around you.

Check yourself!!

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