Ask Toi: Is dating a Co-worker a good idea?

On the surface the answer is no.  However if you do you have to be clear on a few guidelines.

1. Does your Job have a policy against it? 

If they do it would be good to adhere to it or be prepared to suffer the consequence.  I know of plenty of couples who have wiggled around it and have had life long love.  For me it would have to be with someone I found very intriguing as well as after spending time wanted to make a real investment.

However if your job frowns upon it don’t go losing coins for just anyone.  It’s a lot easier to get fired than hired than it was maybe 10 years ago. 

2. Are you willing to change your work environment behind it?

No matter the intention after you date a Co worker, you’re interactions as well as those around you will be forever changed.  You will not be able to go back to how things were prior to dating.

If things ended amicably you may still be able to work well with each other.  However, if things went left you may find yourself in a hostile working environment.

Lastly another element to consider is to keep things private until you are sure you even want to reveal.  Often times other co-workers will add unnecessary static and cause more headache than its even worth. 

Dating a co-worker isn’t an easy yes or no answer.  I dated a co-worker before and it was a bad situation.  That co-worker got fired because I believe my boss didn’t want us together.  We remained friends after it all because we made an agreement to do so and kept things light.  I’ve heard of horror stories of others dating a co-worker that have been downright horrible.  So be clear on what you want to do and think about all the moving pieces.

It may be easier to date someone else who doesn’t work with you so you can have your workplace be separate from your personal.  Best of luck to whatever you decide.


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