5 steps behind…

I’m still officially snowed in.  Like most folks I live on a secondary road so to get out will take skill.  Skill I don’t have.  Nonetheless I’m taking in the moment.  Now with the storm I’ve had a lot of time to be on social media etc.  I came across a story that made me mad and sad at the same time.

A woman was raped by her husband and the question of can this even happen.  In this day and age people still can’t wrap their minds around the concept.  It’s a real thing.  Just because a woman is married doesn’t give her husband the right to take her body as he sees fit.  If a married woman says no that husband can’t just pin her down and rape her.  This concept of respect doesn’t exist.  The courts don’t even acknowledge rape with spouses as real.  Yet there are woman all over the world being raped by spouses everyday.

It hurts my heart to think of this happening.  Most men are generally physically stronger and sometimes bigger  than their wives.  To think I can be pinned by my husband, say no, be raped and then no none will hear my voice because I married him is scary.  Listen I don’t mean to damper your Monday but we have to think outside the box to be a refuge for other women who can’t get those around her to listen.

Women are still seen as 5 steps behind the men.  When I think of all the women who even today are struggling to find their voice it’s disheartening.  Think about it.  Men make more than women generally.  These women have to fight twice as hard to get the same respect men can just show up and get.  Women who are mothers are even more discriminated as well.  If a mom has to leave for an appointment, she is often judged if she can “handle” her responsibilities at work especially if the appointment is for her child.   If she leaves work to care for her sick child she is often judged as someone who isn’t giving 100%.  Men don’t usually have to play Russian Roulette with their jobs in order to balance home and work life, but women do.

It’s not the responsibility of just mothers alone to take care of the cares of the home.  Women are working and taking care of the homes everyday.  The days where women are in the home alone isn’t as common place as it was years ago.  We need to get the government, jobs, etc to understand the changing roles of women today.  No woman should have to choose between her ability to provide and the ability to be a woman or a mother.

We have to be willing women to take a stand against this.  Some of the very policies you work under are to blame.  That’s why women are being forced to subsidize their income on the very system that wants them off.  How can a woman who is working to go to school and work be penalized so harshly?  Now for those who say what about the women who sit at home on government programs and have no desire to do better? Simply we give a time line to be off.  Welfare and state programs are supposed to be a means to assist not be the end game for many homes.  We need to assist these women to get out and find ways of obtaining gainful employment.  They will need the skills to obtain it.  Make it mandatory for them to attend certain workshops.  Will this fix it all? No but we need to take some steps to get it there.  We need state laws that protect the working woman as well.  That’s why it irritates me to no end when we don’t vote.  I know there are some that say it doesn’t help but how will your voice be heard if you’re not using it.

For every woman who is assaulted, for every woman who is passed over for a position, for every woman who is victimized by the court systems, and those who are in systematic programs that aren’t really serving their needs, let’s not only talk but get an action plan.  There are always petitions to be made and signed, rallies, meeting to attend, etc anything that gets us in the front talking to the folks that matter.  No matter how small or great we got to evoke change.



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