Ask Toi: Can a person be turned on sexually from a conversation and it be considered cheating?

Yes and no.  I know it’s like I’m straddling the fence on this question but it is what it is.  A man or woman can be turned on my another woman or man and not be cheating on their spouse.  I think sometimes we forget that vows don’t give super human strength. Cheating is a character flaw.  It has nothing to do with arousal alone.  Now if your mate leaves the presence of that aroused moment and doesn’t turn it off than yes it can be the seed for cheating.  Now the flip to that is it doesn’t mean that your spouse doesn’t love you or isn’t sexually attracted to you based only on the arousal of another person.  It means that they were turned on and its up to them to turn themselves off.

A simple conversation and not even anything on a sexual nature can turn a person on. I can go through a number of arousal points but that’s not the point.  The point is in whether your mate acts on the arousal.  I know people talk about cheating on the level of emotional cheating.  Again arousal has to do with being physical moved by another person.  It could be something abut the conversation, the way a person dresses, cologne that is can be very inviting.  So yes I believe that emotional cheating exists.  Emotional cheating takes place when two people are engaging in a relationship but no sexual intimacy has taken place.  This is more than the normal get to know you relationship. There is time and energy invested.  This usually occurs where two people have access or gives access to each other and when one of them are not around, the other misses them because of the heart ties that was created.  Please understand the two.  Simple arousal is not enough to tell your mate that they are cheating. The thing to do is to keep an open dialogue so your mate can honestly tell you how he or she feels.  That is part of  trusting or building a trust relationship.  They aren’t created overnight.  As a married couple he or she needs to keep their vows.  Being faithful is a part of the vows.

Conversations can be invigorating.  It’s something about listening to a man or woman be able to let beautiful words come out of their mind.  When someone can really have a conversation on more than the superficial level trust me when I say its a very moving thing.  Everyone don’t have to cross boundaries and unless you dealing with a tack head a simple conversation can be an opener but it should take more than sweet words to move someone to take the full plunge of an affair.  If they do its something in them that allowed it.



2 thoughts on “Ask Toi: Can a person be turned on sexually from a conversation and it be considered cheating?

  1. I do believe that cheating can be an emotional relationship as well. If any intimate information is being exchanged between two parties this is an emotional relationship. Establishing an emotional relationship outside of your partner is a form a cheating in my book.

    Liked by 1 person

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