We got to speak up about the boys club!

So if you follow me on Facebook you know that I recently read an article published by Essence.com regarding Jamal Bryant who is a pastor in Baltimore, Maryland.  He was married at one point and cheated on his wife and as a result of the cheating fathered children outside of his marriage. His wife left him and he almost lost his church.  He made every declaration that he was a changed man.  Then flash forward to now where he is in the midst of yet another scandal where although not married he has fathered another child.  So….where do I begin?

I am fully aware of God’s grace and even though God can do a quick work still on Mr. Bryant the truth of the matter is that I think we more accountability in the house of God.  I know this conversation is going to go left fast.  I have received so much backlash that I decided to write about it today.  I have grown up in the church my whole life.  Being the case, at the end of the day being a Preachers Kid I will not sugar coat where Jamal is right now.  Had this been a woman pastor and she cheated on her husband and had a baby the conversation would have been over.  She would have been sat down, put out the church, and that would have been the end.  Well not in the boys club.  In the boys club men are allowed to not step down from position and continue in the same behavior after everything dies down.  Wow so a man can use the member between his leg to defile his marriage, disrespect God and his call, and continue to use that same member between his legs like nothing happened?  That’s good stuff right there.

The boys club has no place in the world let alone the church.  So we are okay with the man of God who is full of lust to speak over our souls day in and day out.  This same man of God is allowed to tell us where we are wrong and need to get it together or else, right?  Wrong. What I am saying is simple.  Sit him down.  He needs to get in control his desire to have sex.  Let’s keep this real and I mean all the way real, he cheated on his wife and now is fathering a baby out-of-wedlock and he ain’t get that nor the rest of the kids simply by reading the Bible.  No, he got that from having sex to whomever would allow it.  So if he likes sex that’s fine but his desire don’t line up with what the good book says so he needs to either line up with the good book or sit down and wait until he does.  Oh and you know he ain’t lay down with the new baby’s mother one time, that means he was having sex with her and anyonelse but just got caught.  You up to speed now.  That’s how it works. Okay, lesson over.

Bishop Eddie Long is another mega church pastor who used his money and influence on boys and is accused of having sex with them.  We already know from the mere fact that Jamal Bryant is still in position that Long is too.  Who woulda thunk it?  So he’s allowed to be out here doing his thing.  Now it hasn’t come out if he still bending over little boys but end of story there was no accountability.  I’m overly exhausted by this. I just had a friend online get “dragged” for wearing a bathing suit to the beach.  Yes you read that correctly the beach but the same men who came for her were married men with kids who you guessed it are pastors.  Another tidbit openly they drug her for not being saintly but was in her inbox sliding her their number.  You get the point.  We need to stop.  I’m so tired of men getting away with this mess.  Like I said on Facebook it’s not all pastors and its not all men before my male crowd go left.  But if you as a man high-five your boys, sons, cousins etc. for getting it with a woman but want to lock up your precious little girls you are apart of the problem.  You are teaching a double standard. The same men you tell your daughters to avoid you mass produce these same men for them.  Yup the boys club isn’t all chummy when your daughter is crying on your shoulders and you want to get shotguns to handle it. It’s only okay as you sit and slide in in-boxes and emails of women that aren’t your wives for that quick gratification.  It’s only good when you find yourself with a young woman in your bed when you should have been home putting your kids to sleep.  Or wait the boys club is only good when you take on someone else’s kids but you leave yours at home with their mother.  I’ll wait.  Before you get all self righteous you should talk to your daughters but talk to these boys not slide them a condom and tell them the whole world is theirs to conquer.

Sex is good don’t get it twisted but its supposed to be in the right context.  I’m not going to be all holier than thou when 2 of my 3 kids were conceived out-of-wedlock but I also don’t go around telling young mothers that they are worthless or call them hoes like so many of even women who forget their hoe miles don’t have an expiration.  So let’s be clear never throw stones out of a glass house.  The boys club needs to end.  We need to hold all of us on the same lines.  No separate rules for men and then we want to spiritually lock the women up.  Nope.  Any and all pastors male or female who thinks that this backward way of thinking is okay be bold, drop the name of your church so we can all know where not to go. All I am asking is to keep it on the same lines and make these men sit down with the women not the women sit while they have to listen to the same male pastor preach knowing right well at the end of the sermon he going over to sister Watermelon’s for some “fellowship” later.



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