We survived 7 Years of Parenting

On May 26, 2009 I was in a room with my parents and the doctors as my mom basically had to nudge me into making the decision to have a C-section.  I had my best friend, my boyfriend at the time (now husband), and family supporting the decision as well.  So at 11pm my oldest joy Naila was born.  I was told a lot of information. I was suffering from preeclampsia and my blood pressure was completely unstable.  It was at the point where I should have started to have seizures but I didn’t.  My mom kept saying to them they had to do something as the skin on my body began to get darker and darker.They warned me that Naila might have to be put on a ventilator to breath.  They warned me she would spend weeks at the NICU. However on May 26 a screaming, feisty little baby girl was born. She kept taking the nurses finger to eat, she was doing nothing of what they stated she would at 6 weeks premature.  I on the other hand had a lot of recovery to do.

After a week in NICU, I who had left after 4 days was able to take my little baby girl home. That’s when life really began.  It was an up and down struggle. Although she had surpassed the odds she still had asthma.  She also had febrile seizures. The first time she had one she went limb and turned blue.  I was by myself in the house and called 911 scared that I couldn’t keep her alive until help came. I did CPR on her myself and kept her stable. They pulled her from my arms and I clasped in the ambulance.  I didn’t know what was going to happen to her, but she made it. She had more occurrences like this one. I remember my mom crying next to me when she did it in her presence and the same with my mother in law. Both of them hadn’t seen anything like that and felt helpless. During her 1st year our little girl was in the hospital at least 10 times for several things.  It got so bad I learned to keep a suitcase in my trunk.  I could look at her and knew I wouldn’t be able to stay at work all day. She would be admitted. No parent should have the ability to diagnose a child but I knew.  I got stronger in how to deal with her. I knew what to look for and after a while I knew I could give her CPR.  It wasn’t that I dismissed my feelings but I learned how to suppress them until she got the help she needed. I didn’t fall apart because I knew the routine.  Naila being sick affected my job.  I wasn’t even there full time during her sickest days.  If I worked 30 hours that was a win.  So when they downsized of course they added me to the list.  I was devastated.  I didn’t say much to anyone.  I went home with a severance package in hand and cried before I picked up Naila from daycare.  I looked at her and said what was I going to do with no job and a sick baby.  I didn’t qualify for assistance so I literally had to fight this.  With the support of my fiance since he just popped the question the work before made the decision to move to Philadelphia.  Up until this point we were raising her from two different homes.  If you want to know how that transition was read my blog, 5 years down.

Fast forward to present time.  Naila is one of the most sweetest little girls ever. I say that because I am biased and because she is.  Naila is one of the ones that loves everyone.  I literally have to watch her more than any other of my children when we are out because she has such a soft heart for people.  She definitely didn’t get that from me.  I spend too much people watching and discerning for the both of us.  Naila is progressing well in school.  She is a joy to be around.  She has been the reason I have had to learn some of my most toughest moments.  She taught me to be stronger than I thought I could.  She taught me to get help when I need it and not only in medical situations.  She teaches me forgiveness. I’m still working on that one.  My daughter has a high tolerance for things I didn’t have at her age.  She has taught me to smile and be happy.  Everyone of my friends and family will say that about her.  She always says OKAY.  She goes with the flow and she’s very artistic.  This blog was created originally from a place of pain and an outlet because I knew I had to get it right to have the ability to parent her better.  Her attitude in life won’t allow me to be rough with her, to take life for granted, or to not accomplish my own goals.  She is my mini me but a much better version.  She has her own ways about her and I and her dad are super proud of her.  Happy Birthday to mommy and daddy’ little gummy bear, Naila!!!

So we survived 7 years of parenting this joy.  Outside of her health issues she is a good child.  She didn’t give us any issues with behavior.  She could go with anyone so having anyone willing to keep her or babysit her has never been an issue.  She is just a great little girl.  In school we have surrounded her with the things she needs as she continues to become a better student.  Naila is one of those little girls that you can just have fun with and she is happy just for spending time with you.  We survived parenting from 2 different homes. We survived parenting in inlaws’ home. We survived medical emergencies. We survived my postpartum. We survived the stay at home blues. We survived so much and so much more on the horizon and we will do the same, survive.

PS. In case you were wondering she’s healthy and strong no sign of ever being premature mentally or physically and controlled asthma and no more seizures now ain’t that something to be happy about?!  Today we plan on waking her up with nothing but the princess treatment. She will have nothing but love and happiness and all of the things that makes her smile.  She should right? 7 is major in our house, matter of fact every year is.  Birthdays are a big deal!! Birthdays for little girls named Naila is an even bigger deal!!

 

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