The title seems to be misfits, right? It should be but in this society often times people take relationships as a joke. They want their cake and eat it too. They want a main and a side jawn but yet they want loyalty from their mate all wrapped in one package. My thoughts on this is, how can you ask for something you can’t and won’t give? These are the sad tales of what it means to be single and married.
It’s nothing new. Men and women been coupling up since Jesus was a boy. However when you look at what it takes to be in a solid relationship these days it makes you either line up or play an unfair game. Like I said in the introduction of this piece, people want it all but don’t want to give their all. I mean like my mom would tell me don’t get into any relationship if your intentions are to mess over somebody. Let me hip you real quick to some thoughts. I do NOT take kindly to excuses. The whole, I fell on his dick, I wasn’t trying to cheat, it was an accident, I fell out of love. NOPE!! Sorry to be blunt but that’s how I roll. You meant it because there were stop signs in your mind and heart and you yielded to your “other” members. Now I don’t want a woman to think I’m only talking about men because I’m not. Our little members are just as hot as these men, don’t kid yourself. Cheating is a choice. I know things happen that can drive it but end of day if you didn’t attempt to work it out before that point you alone are responsible for your ways.
If you are separated, you are married. If you are married, you are married. If you thinking about cheating but you are married, you married and need to be honest with yourself but you are still married. Same thing in relationships if you made a commitment honor yourself first to do the right thing. You got someone posting lovey dovey pictures of you, talking about how great a guy or woman you are but then there’s another woman or man who shouldn’t be in your 2 person relationship knowing you ain’t about that life because they just got a “hey beautiful” text from you. Just stop! Yup happens all the time. Back in the day when my parents were young if you cheated it was something where you had to pick up a phone, meet at your special meeting spot, but you didn’t have the audience of social media to help you. I get into debates all the time about does social media ruin relationships and I say no. It’s the people who readily use social media to slide into DM(s), etc. Convenience is not the excuse its the person who desired it, entertained it, and then when about their way to turn it into reality.
Either you is or you ain’t my baby. There is no in-between. If you want to play those type of games than be single and mingle but don’t take and allow another person to be hurt by your betrayal. Let me hip you to a little game for both men and women, if you housing and financing and feeding someone you KNOW is cheating on you, DO NOT be fooled by the baby I’m sorry line. People will say anything for a meal and a roof over their head. Study them actions. When you dealing with someone who doesn’t have their personal life together its easy for them to hold on to you with whispers of lies. They need you. Be with someone who wants to be invested due to their love and not what they can obtain from you. For some of you that alone will weed out them busters in your life. You won’t need to ask a psychic, your bestie, or anyone else about if you should leave him or her alone.
Now I get that marriages go through things. They do. I know when you get married you expect the honeymoon to be an ongoing enterprise. It can be but be honest about your expectations and know that there are times when things get hot and heavy and there are times when you have to remind yourself of your vows. The hard times isn’t an open door to do what you want to do. Do the right thing or be grown enough to speak to your mate. I know the whole don’t tell thing works for some but there are people dying for their choices. There are STD’s that don’t even have names attached to them and all the condoms in the world and spermicide can still get you caught up. So stop playing Russian Roulette with your mate’s life. There are more people undercover then the men we want to blast for being on the down low and that’s real. Many of wives and husbands hiding secrets from each other that cost the ones they thought they love hell. Oh and by the way you ain’t got enough coin to maintain two relationships. One of them or both of them to be honest are suffering.
I admonish my single and married to pick a team and stick to it. I would rather be hurt by a mate who left me and was honest with me than to share a man any day. No community peen or vagina is allowed. You need to make a decision that you are married and in this thing for the long haul. Oh to my secret lovers out there who love glorifying the side piece life, a side piece of chicken ain’t ever going to fulfill a grown person like a whole meal. You ain’t winning no matter how many trinkets and wet sheets you get along the way. So be clear on who you want. If you want to be in a committed relationship let your actions line up with your lips.