Today is super sad. I can’t shake the sadness. I had another blog planned today but at the end of the day it doesn’t seem right to post. Whether you thought Kobe was an amazing basketball player is neither here nor there. His work ethic speaks for itself. However, the videos we see circulating of his amazing bond he had with his family is what matters most.
Kobe rode that helicopter many times. He took that trek many times and I am sure he didn’t imagine that would be the one thing that would take him. I can’t imagine the last moments of his and his daughter’s life. What I know is that when people live a message that says live life to the fullest that is what we should be doing. This isn’t about using his death to motivate you because as great as the message is, we have lost before and folks still lived their lives the way they wanted to. Death should always shake you to move better. It should shake you to walk better. It should shake you to love better.
Death is inevitable. One of the things I think about often is my children. In death it would separate us. I think about where they are in their ages and pray daily that I give them what they need for the season of life they are in. I pray daily and actively work towards making sure that their time with me is from a place of love and that even in grief would they feel as if I honored them in how I treat them, speak to them, etc. It matters to me. It matters that I leave them in love. We pray with them and remind them daily that we could leave each other and not return. I pray whomever you leave and circle back daily with that you remind yourself of that. I think it’s the reason why during an argument I keep in mind that moments can be stolen. My husband and I was in a sorted dispute moments before the break of the news. However, we are never sorted out enough not to keep love in-between us. It matters.
Yesterday my husband made sure to tell me not to go on social media and not to look at my phone. I had college friends call me to make sure I was okay. I knew something was wrong because my phone had about 10 missed calls. I was at a play I didn’t have access to my phone. I am grateful that my husband made sure he made that call to me because I see where friends had simply shared the news via text and that would have sent me over the edge. He knew that and made sure I had heard about it properly. I think it changes how I will inform others of a passing of a celebrity or loved ones. No text messages only calls. I realized how that may make others feel just experiencing it for myself.
So, what now? We know in the coming weeks it will be a funeral or memorial whether its shared publicly or privately. We know that the pain will only increase as we see glimpses of the Bryant family move about and try to heal during this hard time. We know that their lives will NEVER be the same. What happens next? Will people be respectful during this time? Nope! I already seen some of the most trash comments and statues on Facebook. I know and want to encourage us to remember that our social media presence matters. It matters how we speak on things. When we make assumptions or conversations on others it matters. Watch what we say and speak from a place of truth and love. You don’t have to “keep it real” and be ignorant in the name of being “real!”
Kobe leaves a hole in the world. I hope that others take this time to use that hole and place love in its place. I was a teenager and I used to call myself Mrs. Bryant. He was one of my first crushes. As he moved with his family, I would always still admire him. He carried himself in many situations good or bad and I still loved him. People will no doubt once this calms down speak of his past. We all have one and that won’t change the fact that above it all Vanessa and the girls lost their covering. They lost the love of their life. They lost the one who showered them love. I pray for not only the Bryant family but all the families who lost their loved ones during that tragic accident. Today this makes me increase showering my friends and family with more love. We should be grieving but we also need to increase more love to those around us. Today is still sad and it will be probably be this way. Anyone giving someone a hard time on the following premises:
Kobe was just a celebrity
People die everyday
You didn’t know him what’s the fuss
This will calm down it’s not my issue
Why are people so worried about him he has money?
NONE of those things matter. You can be human and take a death of someone you admired hard. You can stand in love with Vanessa and the remaining survivors’ families, and you can sprinkle grace towards others during this time. I send love out to those who need it and will receive it.