Monday Motivation: Christmas Edition

As the holidays are exactly 8 days away one of the things that I have changed is not waiting until the last-minute for everything. I have a few things to do but I am not allowing any of it to get under my skin. For that I am grateful. I know the holidays aren’t about giving gifts or receiving gifts as much as it’s about be a blessing to those around me and spending time with my family and which is my personal choice to celebrate the birth of the Savior.

gift present macro bokeh

Photo by Tookapic on Pexels.com

I am not allowing the hustle and bustle of the season to make me crazy.  I am not going to spend time getting into countless arguments over stuff that I know that I can’t change. I know I can manage my time. I know I can prepare things early enough to be sure that things are the way I want them.  I know that beyond preparing for the actual day of Christmas is about preparing for the kids to be on break. Finding them activities that can be done in and out of the house that won’t break my budget.  These are the things that I am allowing to motivate my week. I don’t want to be sitting around upset or making myself vulnerable to mindless arguments over who should be doing what and when.

Be intentional about your thoughts this week. Your to do list will get done in tine. Do what you can and what can’t be done, don’t max out cards to do it. Don’t stress your life so that you are going more and more into debt and pain in the New Year. Do not do more for folks if it isn’t coming from a good place and a good heart. I have cut out a large amount of spending by focusing on the kids in my life. That doesn’t mean I didn’t get any adults but I definitely didn’t try to get all of the adults I know. Balance is my focus. My motivation is keeping the spirit of fun in my thought process. Playing with my children. Making time to watch movies with them. Making sure that I bake with them. Not worrying about material parts alone. Some people really lose it trying to keep up with the Jones’s.  Don’t let that be you. There are a million things to be celebrated. Families coming together that were torn apart, checking in on the elderly, seeing strangers smile who might have been so down that the holidays seem like a joy kill to them, serving the less fortunate, any and everything can be seen through different lenses. Do not loss that focus as you wrap gifts, prepare food, and set out outfits.

joyeux noel neon signage hanging beside christmas tree

Photo by Colin Schmitt on Pexels.com

This week, choose joy. Choose to see the good in this already evil world. Choose to be grateful for what you have and the little you may think you have may be someone else’s portion. Choose to be happy that you have the ability to make decisions that affect your life. Choose to smile more. Choose to be kind to others around you. Pay it forward. We need to hear more stories of others doing for those around them than taking. Let’s hear it this week for making sure you check in on others. There is a lot of pain that comes in with the  holidays too. As much as I love celebrating, I know that some folks are hurting. Some folks are experiencing high levels of pain, death, grieve, etc. My heart goes out to them. I have been praying for more people who are in these situations more and more as the holiday gets closer. Think of those people around you. Motivate your Monday and week to the things that matter that don’t have anything to do with price tags.

Keep your mind and heart clear. Sending you love as you go into the home stretch of this week!

Advertisements

Sunday Message: Stand in your Own Light

There’s so much expectations going on. I’m watching a lot of current events and hearing debates on all types of things. One thing to keep in mind is allowing people to find their way and stay in their own light. So many times we want to make others come you our points about everything. Let people do what feels right to them.

We don’t want people to be cookie cutter versions of everyone around us. Being unique and different is what makes us spark. Learning that you can be among others and be yourself is the only way for you to know and live in authenticity. So don’t worry if you’re ideas don’t match others. Make sure whatever you bring to the table is what you intended. It’s important for you to stand in truth. I’ve learned over the years how amazing life can be when you live on your terms while respecting others around you.

So as we enter this last week of Christmas and you begin to focus on your new goals for the New Year don’t forget to honor yourself. Don’t make your goals on what others think you should be. Don’t wait until the stroke of midnight to be motivated. Start working towards your goals now. Add a new goal each week or even each day. Your goals won’t just turn on January 1st. Your goals need to be turned on every time you wake up. What one or two things can you go to live in your truth and let your light shine?! Do them daily. If you honor yourself it will help you to honor others around you!

Stand in your light today!

Made in Philadelphia Holiday Market

I had the elite pleasure of taking the tour of the Made in Philadelphia Holiday Market. This was my actual first time! Now like the Christmas Village, it’s an open air market. It features delicious foods from of course Philadelphia. It also features artisans, designers, crafters, with gifts under beautifully designed tents.

So as we began the tour the first stop was at Philly Sausage. It features two sausages the Italian Market and the Philly Sausage. Amazing doesn’t even describe the way my tastebuds felt. The cold began to be less frigid as soon as that warm sausage hit my tongue. They were excited to be out there and welcomed us with warm arms. Trust me we needed it!

The second stop was of course to the Beer Garden. Nothing warms me like alcohol. With three different flavors to choose from it’s a match made for everyone. I of course tried the Lemon Meringue IPA that had the highest alcohol content. Judge your mother it was cold. It’s super tasty! You definitely need to try it!

We enjoyed the Deck the Halls Light Show sponsored by Independence Blue Cross. An electrifying display of music, magic and lights all covering City Hall was an absolute delight! I loved the part when as we watched people didn’t just watch and filmed, they also sang along!

The fourth stop of the night was at Popcorn Obsessions. 80, yes that’s right 80 flavors of out of this world flavors. I highly recommend the mint chocolate, peppermint stick, and the chocolate cookie dough. They were sweet perfection. This goes outside of the normal flavors you would find at a local spot. They have sweet to savory flavors! You will not leave disappointed

So by this point I’m happily jittery as we took a walk to the Winter Garden sponsored by TD Bank. This garden has seating for those who want to enjoy their beer. Speaking of beer, at Dilworth the new treat this year is not being restricted to drink only in the garden. You can drink your beer while you walk and shop. The only place you can’t is within City Hall.

I absolutely loved the Winter Garden. It’s visually stunning, plenty of seats to enjoy your drinks, and the reindeer grass displays were super cute.

Now one of the highlights was stopping at Lokal Artisan Foods for the French Toast Bites. Now I know everyone loves French toast however if my French toast ain’t crunchy I don’t like it. This French Toast changed my perspective. It was deep-fried and the owner, Charisse McGill made my French toast bites with love. Have you ever met someone who just had that IT quality?! She’s it. She’s personable, passionate, and makes French toast tell a pancake to get down!! I was impressed and I look forward to seeing more in the future from the whole company. PS she quit her job 3 weeks ago and went from punching a clock to walking in her destiny. I can’t wait to watch her story unfold.

One of the jewels of the night was Gourmet Creations. These spreads which we tried on pretzels can be used on various foods. I tried just about all of them and the highlights for me was the chocolate raspberry and the Cheddar Ale.

On our next stop we made our way to Cynful Bliss. This is a mobile alcohol and non alcohol infused desserts. Now yes I love my “adult juice,” but this was more than that. The passion that was shown through the product is a hit for the holidays and beyond. I had “Greed.” It was peach cobbler and peach brandy. What I loved is anyone who makes desserts with alcohol knows alcohol will burn off during the process. However they add more than enough to have a shot in a glass with premium alcohol. I’ll be ordering some for the family. Who doesn’t like desserts? This was the perfect combination. You can have your cake and drink it too!!

Who doesn’t love cannolis? I know I love them. We had to include the stop to the Cannoli Cafe. Fresh and sweet. I loved it.

Nothing says the holidays like cookies. Our stop at Picket Fence Confections was a pure delight. Homemade and beautifully decorated they were a sweet treat. Kera puts her heart into her creations. These cookies are fresh and amazing. I had the apple cinnamon oatmeal cookie and it was the perfect mesh of perfectly paired ingredients as well as it was one is the softest cookies I’ve had in a long time.

After all of that eating it was time to take a ride on the Carousel. As cold as it was and as much as we thought we would be too cold to enjoy it, our inner kid came out immediately as soon as the ride started. How could it not?! Everyone loves the fun and excitement of a carousel ride. Grown folks riding around, smiling, and laughing made us forget for seconds that we were in under 40 degrees.

So off to Penn Potato Fries. Amazing chicken and fries. It was well worth the wait. They didn’t just have it pre made. It was made while we waited. We were able to talk, ask questions, and dance along to Christmas music but once I ate the fries and chicken immediately I knew that this was a stop we couldn’t have had passed up.

Since the Holiday Market has something for everyone I was even able to stop at Piggy Back Treats to grab a treat for my furry brother Sammy. These are human grade treats for dogs and cats. Definitely don’t forget the pets in your life. These treats can be delivered locally and mailed. Get your orders in soon to guarantee before Christmas.

Now to end the night well at least food wise we stopped at Woops. Woops is the macaroon of macaroons. All kinds of flavors to choose from and I highly recommend the mint chocolate. The only issue is which ones to choose from.

One of the last highlights outside of the Rothman Orthopedics Cabin is of course the Ice Rink. Everyone of all ages enjoying a night of skating, smiles and some of the best Christmas music!!!

So if you love food, you’re covered. If you love beautiful one of a kind gifts, you’re covered. If you want to gather your friends and family for a good time for the Light Show or Ice Skating, you are covered. What’s not covered is getting all of this for too much longer. Be sure to get out and leave the hustle of the holidays and make time for fun!!

With all of the holiday options you got to make sure you don’t miss any of it. Stop by the Made in Philadelphia Holiday Market!!

Monday Motivation: Movement Necessary

It’s another Monday! Another week! Another chance to make our lives the best that we can. It’s a time to reset and refocus. So many of us start our Monday’s complaining. I get it. You had no real work responsibility all weekend long and now it’s back to the grind. However instead of looking at how blah you feel, find a way to refocus your efforts!

The New Year will be here soon where everyone will make promises to themselves but often times those promises fall by the wayside because we don’t actively look towards our goals. If you don’t like your job what are you actively doing to make that change? If you aren’t happy in a relationship, what are you doing to work on yourself that will give you the strength to see your worth? These things matters. The reason successful people have success is they don’t turn their brains off. They are constantly in active motion.

As you begin your week and Monday what are you doing to have active motion in your life? What steps are you working towards to set yourself to success? Move. Make things happen. Everyday you can move yourself that much closer to greatness! Everyday! If your losing weight daily checking your eating habits and how you are moving will get you towards those goals!! Everyday you have the power to evoke a strong level of change! This change can be personal and in the world around you!

So what are you doing this fine Monday?! Own your flaws. Own your goals and refocus them daily, weekly, and monthly! Get moving! Move towards your goals!! Move! Make the necessary changes!! Move towards the you that you want to be!!

Monday Motivation: Checking in on Others

The holidays are in full swing. Its going to be so much going on and before you know it the year will be over. Why is it important on a Monday to talk about checking in on others? Strong people have a tendency to hold themselves in and not really open up. You can send a text and get a response that things are fine but there is something uniquely special about a phone call.  People’s voice and really making sure they are okay are important.

shallow focus photography of a woman in green top wearing white coat

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

So slow it down a little bit and make a list of friends and be sure they are okay. There is something that it pushes you when you do. If you speak to your friends and you  hear that they are truly good, it inspires you. If they aren’t it will inspire you too to either help where you can, offer support, or make you change how you live your life. We can’t lost the connection to one another. I love technology its an important tool, but it can’t replace human to human connection. It’s important for us to reach out to our loved ones. I make it a plan to do my best to call my grandmother at least once a week and sometimes more to be sure she is okay. You have to check in on others. I am even going to check in on a few family members that I haven’t done a great job in checking in on this year myself. It’s just a way for us to take a step back and put others above ourselves.

If you are super busy like me, set aside some time and dedicate to making at least a few minute calls. If you think the other person may be long-winded, I love to call folks on my lunch break, on my way home, or on my way into work. It’s a great way to have a mid-day pick me up or a way to make sure you get it done  and I can cut the conversation off and get back to my day. You may be thinking well wasn’t the point to check in? Yes that is still checking in. You don’t have to be on the phone for hours to check in. I believe in my planner so in between blog goals and planning, family planning, and life planning you can add check ins. You will feel better when you do this, trust me. This goal is just as important as anything else you have going on in your world.

Be vigilant in checking in on others. Be sure that those that are in your crew are okay. Make this your Monday goal! Maybe even rotate your check in lists. But make this a priority!

How Long Should You Continue to Make Excuses for Adults?

I saw this question posed and it intrigued me. So examples of excuses for adults could be that family member that is always in and out of jail. The notion to say well they had a rough up bringing so that is why they are like “that.” I do agree your childhood and upbringing if left not dealt with will constantly come back to your memory and life. Butttttt when is enough, enough? When is that family or friend held responsible for their actions? Does everyone have to make excuses to soften the blow of the act committed? I would say no. I would say adults should be held accountable for thier actions and if you choose to make excuses due to your heart strings being attached that is fine. Please don’t make that a matter of fact for others to follow suit.

So let me dip into myself because its safer to speak on me than for me to give examples of others. If I have been dealing with issues in life and continue to make excuses and rebuttals for bad behavior, eventually the man-made grace that we extend to those around us will run out. This simply means that my friends and family will to a certain degree get tired of the mess that I continue to implode on others. As an adult I can have validity in my past as reasons to go back and mark a yes check mark on my actions. However as an adult it is also my personal responsibility to deal with myself so that what is going on inside of my life doesn’t spill out to others.

Many people believe that their issues are contained and it doesn’t spill out to others. This is false. Often times whatever you have on your heart will always spill out. This is why I personally take accountability now regarding what I say and do. I try to teach my kids the same. Instead of saying I didn’t mean it say I meant what I said and I apologize that I haven’t dealt with my issues. Everyone I know literally hates when you don’t take responsibility for mean things said. I think its insulting to others not to. So adults if you can read this we ALL have things that we need to deal with. Its our responsibility to deal with them. You can not continue to walk in absurdity and make everyone the scape goat for your issues and problems.

How long do you give an adult accountability for their problems? Immediately. How long do you make excuses for them is your heart issue. Sometimes you defend out of love and embarrassment. You can make that decision for how long you want to give, but the world is giving age to adulthood for understanding of right and wrong. I read a story of the daycare worker who smothered a baby and killed the baby because she was frustrated and didn’t have help that day. She can be forgiven I am sure. We all want and need it in some form, but she forever changed a family and an innocent child is no longer here. She is responsible for her actions. How the family chooses to forgive her is their right to take. However she bears the responsibility for that precious life that she took. So if you heart chooses to give your family and friends many excuses but after a while the reality is we can’t expect those around us to be willing to accept excuses just because another adult choose to give the “that’s just how they are excuse.”

It is imperative that you have to be able to understand that the stand you take with other adults in what they do may not be the same stand that others will support you on.  If i have hurt a friend and that friend chooses to forgive me and another one doesn’t, its their right. I can move in forgiveness and show a turned life by actions. My actions require me to accept responsibility because there was a part of me that in whatever was done I knew better. We teach kids to say sorry for wrongs. We then wait for them to be adults and then think now we have to atone for them. We don’t. It takes a lot to forgive and we should be working towards forgiveness. However you can forgive and not make excuses for the behavior too. Forgiveness may not always mean reconciliation. It may mean peace to live without staying in an offended state.

Lastly whether we want to admit to it or not, we all have the ability to make the necessary changes that we need. We all have the same 24 hours in a day to choose to walk in negativity, positivity, old habits, or make new choices. We all have the ability to know that we are wrong and make right living solutions. So when you see someone wasting them, know too that is also their choice. Know that you can cover them in grace but you don’t have to a blind eye to their mess. I think that’s the biggest thing you can do is be honest with yourself even if you choose to not openly tell others that they were right about their choices. A few years ago I came to grips with myself in so many forms. I had to take responsibility for my actions and in addition to that I had to be willing to change. Even if I never personally thank the people, places and things that were used to hold that mirror of reality up to me, I know that it exists and I choose to take actions daily to support a better mental, emotional, and physical way of being better in my own skin.

 

Operating In Offense

So today I was reminded of what it looks like to operate in offense. Operating in offense is when you are so offended by someone or something that you can’t hear what others are saying to you. You are snippy, rude, loud and angry. Not one thing is heard from that moment. You aren’t willing to see someone else because you have taken the focus off of the issue and made it about self.  This is a self-righteous stance. There is nothing that will be gained walking in offense.  The world is really walking in offense. A lot of it is real and some of it comes from a deep seeded place that needs to be healed.

Now I wasn’t the person operating in offense today but I was able to see the old me through the eyes of the other person’s offense. Like many who have attempted to speak to me in moments of rage, anger, etc. in the past,  I saw what its like talking to a wounded person. You can’t heal that situation or person until you deal with their pain. Period. I don’t care how many cute quotes, speeches, etc. you give, they aren’t going to listen. I think about some of my past hurt prior to counseling and I seen how extremely closed off I was. Not willing to hear a person because all I kept focusing on  was myself.  Today I was hit with that same reality. I was humbled and blessed to see that for one I had real growth. The old me would have dipped into offense and gave folks a run for their money. My mouth is for sure a sword. I know this about me and with that mindset I do all I can to check myself first before handing out a 2 piece!  I listened to them and saw them for their pain and gifted them grace.  Isn’t it funny how you will confront yourself in another form down the line?

light black and white portrait canon

Photo by Demeter Attila on Pexels.com

I gave the person the grace that wasn’t extended to me. This is probably the part that I struggle with the most. Not giving of grace, because my life is a grace walk, but knowing that lack of maturity didn’t allow or wont allow people to see my past issues as simply me walking in offense. My ability to see myself works wonders for me NOW.  My biggest challenge is feeling like I have to apologize a thousand times and do emotional backflips for folks to see growth. I have now come or am coming to peace with the notion that after you take a step back some folks won’t see you for your growth because they never wanted to see you grow in the first place. They saw the offense and used it to get off their chest what they had in them the whole time.  As I watched the situation unfold this morning and while I stayed calm I just said let me gift this grace. Let me not get offended at their offense. Let me let time, maturity, and step back. It will be fixed eventually. We all have to check ourselves and walk without sometimes getting the apology that we think we need or want. I couldn’t get through to the person this morning.  I probably wont for some time. I can’t do anything past their offense. That is a hard pill to swallow but such is life.  Eventually I pray they have their moment like I had to have mine. Hurt people or offended people can’t operate with your best interest in mind until they deal with their issues.  It doesn’t matter how old or young, how smart, etc. We all have a responsibility to do our daily work and check ourselves.

My message for anyone  who is  walking in offense, you will not grow and heal until you deal with you. I could give you a virtual high-five over your offense. You could be like YASSSS SIS I was right to be offended. I did that to and justified my responses, but the truth is that the offense was there to help you grow. It wasn’t so you could prove anything. It was there to make you whole. Once you tap into that you really will have deep seeded change.

 

I know this sounds super deep on Wednesday when you were just grateful for simply surviving your week but it is a necessary nugget. Sometime you are fighting a person and its like punching air. You are attempting to get through to someone who isn’t ready to receive because they cant get past their offense or even their general disdain of you to keep it real. This is across ALL relationships. Even romantic ones. If you and your boo is always up in arms its because instead of hearing you are defending your offense. You are coming to the table of communication with your guard up so high nothing is reaching past this imaginary wall of offense. That’s what happened today. (FYI I am not talking about my husband) That wall was so high it would have taken Olympic size strides to overpower it.

Today was interesting to say the least especially since it’s not even noon but remember when you head is on right, your at peace in your life, its not just so you can be in a peace bubble.  You will see you and either be grateful for change or have to say ouch and be the change. To the person I encountered today that was and is walking in offense, I pray that you have your moment of inner clarity. I wish you the best as my peace remains!