Monday Motivation: Gather Yourself

So today I did my normal wake up in a great mode. Put on music. Wake the kids with love and a healthy dose of sarcasm while declaring a great day.  All of my intentions were in the right place, but the way life is set up….

close up of drink served on white surface

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I really almost took a mental health day. The type of day when you say oh well and you get into the bed and act like the day isn’t in full swing. These days are super necessary when you really need them. However with all that I had on my plate I had to take a few minutes to gather myself. Stop and pray, control my mouth, retract my thoughts….and still the day went left. I would love to tell you that the day just got better but it hasn’t… fully.  Will it? I am not sure it matters. It wasn’t in the gathering of myself that was going to make the day great, it was just in the press. When you attempt to keep your mind clear and your heart pure it seems as if life will just cooperate.  That  is false advertisement. Things go left and that is what it does.  We live another moment to change our perspective and make things right!

woman standing by closed shutter door

Photo by Thiago Matos on Pexels.com

Today and any other day I am still responsible for my thought patterns and my responses no matter what is going on around me. That little nugget is for those who say well my day sucks so I…. SO you what? You can spew negativity onto the world due to your disposition? NOPE. SO you can make those around you miserable? NOPE. SO you can go to work dumping your nasty attitude on others? NOPE.  You are supposed to remain in control of you at all times even when the traffic is backed up, your coffee was made with milk instead of almond work, and you get to work almost an hour late like I did. You have to remain in control with the ones in your home push indirectly their issues onto you. You have to gather yourself. I didn’t have to gather my words this morning in my house because I got to a corner, prayed, and realigned myself.  I know we all have bad Mondays but that Monday blues can be worked out. You can gather and reset in the midst of total chaos.

So if your day looks like mine did-there is hope. It doesn’t mean that gathering yourself will bring bountiful blessings in that immediate moment but you also don’t have to bring chaos to those around you until your day levels out.  Will it level out? Eventually but you can either delay that blessing with bad attitudes, bad responses, and spewing negativity on others while you wait without pressing. Press because that’s what adults do. Press because you owe it to yourself to not waste another minute on this Earth in a negative mindset. You owe yourself all the love and peace you can surround with!

I can happily report that the coffee chain that messed up my order refunded me almost double what I paid….the day is picking up and I hope yours is too! Lets do this Monday!

Advertisements

Sunday Message: Get Some Discernment

Discernment is the ability to see and hear beyond what people do and say. Discernment is necessary in dealing with others. It’s the link behind knowing when to walk away, leave a situation, proceed, or caution yourself. It’s like having the answer within you.

Discernment is the principle in making and living in healthy relationships, knowing when to make a business venture, or if you should continue in whatever goals you have on your plate. When you lack discernment often times you end up in situations that could have been avoided but it’s like you missed major cues. This is why you need it. The time and energy you save having discernment is necessary in life.

It’s like a compass and an alarm. I listen more when people talk. Discernment will slow their words down and reveal their true intentions if and only you slow yourself down to tap in. An example I was with a friend who I thought was a friend I should say. That friend suggested that we attend an event. As I listened more that friend suggested we “bump” into another friend. Had I not been listening I would have ran into an altercation. Something on the inside allowed me to not ignore the warning signs. That “friend” wanted me to help them ambush someone they were having an issue with.

Not that I couldn’t be a wingman, the issue was bigger than that. This “friend” didn’t even value me in that moment. They needed me to fight and didn’t even have sense to warn me before hand. FYI that “friend” became an immediate associate and ended up getting in trouble behind the situation. She went on pure emotions and had I been there I would have gotten in trouble too. And the higher issue had to do with a man and that I was getting cues when she kept talking but wouldn’t pinpoint why she was mad to begin with.

Discernment saved me from a situation that I might have even been blamed fully on since the non friend wasn’t the most loyal person to begin with. I attempted to use my discernment to warn the non friend but she wasn’t in the place to hear. Keep in mind you can miss cues when you’re not aligned to hear the message.

If you lack discernment, it’s in you. It’s around you. It’s within your grasp. You have to clear out some of the clutter of your mind and heart. I know people who can see other people’s issues but can’t see their own. It’s possible to live like that however discernment is mostly for you. It’s your life guide in this world. It’s the voice of reason and halt. Get you some discernment! There’s not a place that discernment can’t be applied.

Curio Theatre Company Presents: The Winter’s Tale

Where do I start? I had the most magical time at this production. I love everything about a Bohemian garden and what’s better than a Bohemian garden?  A Bohemian beer garden and taking my love of all things Shakespeare to another level.  That’s right it was like getting a two for one in fun and theatre at the same time.

I am so grateful for being exposed to Shakespeare in High School. It really changed my outlook in plays and poetry. When you combine it and have an outstanding production like Curio Theatre has, it was amazing. Every last actor, played their part. They really played them well. I was in the front row where I love to be and the action captured me. I left the theatre unable to go to sleep.

actors

I laughed so hard even though a Winter’s Tale is about Leontes, King of Sicillia gets into a jealous rage thinking that his friend, Polixenes had an affair with his pregnant wife, Queen Hermione. If you never read this Shakespeare classic I won’t spoil it but it includes a lot of turns of events that feature violence, death, betrayal, and forgiveness. It’s true what they say about jealousy, it is a killer. What we think when we don’t control our thoughts turns into negativity and can hurt the ones we love! Nonetheless the pure emotion that each actor gave was amazing. Each actor captured their roles and even if you cant get past the Middle English of the time, if you listen with intent, they played their part enough for you to modernize it and understand it beautifully.

sign

Taking the production from inside and then outside to the Bohemian Beer Garden was the best surprise I didn’t even know I needed. The air was crisp, the wine was sweet and the actors continued to stay in their parts while we enjoyed the best acting intermission I had ever been too. Curio Theatre, this had to be the best part of my night. I had the most magical time. Everyone who attended smiled from ear to ear the entire time. It was a pleasant experience and if they ever have another production, I want to be in the seat.

garden

You only have 2 days to catch this treat. That’s right make your Friday night magical by getting tickets for the 8pm show or tomorrow’s final night at 8 as well. You can get your tickets here. One thing that Curio Theatre does is that when you get your tickets they encourage their new ticket initiative and that’s with Curiositix.  This is a new initiative that allows those who would have not been able to see amazing theatre and make it affordable. When you order your ticket at the time of ordering you can select how much you want to give toward the ticket. You can also even pay for your another ticket so that someone who can’t afford it can.  This is making sure that everyone has the opportunity to get that amazing exposure to theatre.  Also if you want to just donate, you can do that here as well.  No donate is too small.

I would recommend this production for over 15 years of age due to scenes of violence against women and adult themes.

Follow Curio Theatre on their social media channels so you don’t ever miss another production.  Who knows you may see me in the audience real soon:

Twitter

Facebook

Thank you to all of the actors for a job well done. Thank you Curio Theatre for having me and thank you Carrie Gorn for the invite!

Ask Toi: My Estranged parents keep asking me to move my vow renewal date. How do I just stick to my date?

The reader for today is already married and is having a vow renewal. She has changed the date several times and the parents have made reasons to move the date…..

Well you’re estranged for a reason. That reason isn’t a push to keep your date but you should consider the why. When it comes to dates for major events I can see why you attempted to accommodate them. They are your parents. However people will attend that want to attend. If there asking to move the date isn’t about something life threatening I would sit down with your husband and pick a date and stick to it.

Depending on the vendors you can’t move it once selected. Since you are married you and your husband need to choose and unfortunately those who can be there will. As much as you want to make sure they are there the reasons that you gave that they asked you to move don’t seem valid.

Moving the date to accommodate treatment for life saving measures, someone else in the family has already secured the date, or it’s not a date you do not want are reasons to change.

You said your estranged parents want to relax on a date you have given to me to not sound justified. I don’t know the full extent of your relationship but most parents will be at their child’s wedding or vow renewal. If you have changed it and you say they just didn’t like the date, you need to go ahead select a date and move forward.

If you aren’t able to say this is our date start out with reminding them you changed it several times to accommodate them and it isn’t working. Keep in mind you could just send the invite and go from there. You are married and although you want them there it isn’t required and it doesn’t reverse the marriage you are already in.

There could be a number of reasons as to why they are avoiding the date. You can ask. Hopefully they will be forthcoming. Talk from that point. It’s unfortunate that you have this going on but know within yourself you have tried. Make your plans and enjoy the process of getting the wedding you didn’t have a chance in the beginning. Unless they are offering to pay they at this point of numerous accommodations need to attend and be supportive. I was always taught he who has the gold makes the rules. Since you and your husband are paying for it in full, speak to him and make the day about you and his love. Hopefully your parents shake their excuses and be apart or they will have to continue the estranged behavior and you can tackle the real issues outside of this renewal/celebration.

Try to get them to separate the issues before the renewal celebration from the actual day.

Good luck!

Monday Motivation: Light a Fire

Light a fire today. Never let others control your outcome. We do too much complaining about things that aren’t right and not enough making moves. You don’t like your job? Light a fire……under you. Not the job! Get a new one. Have a plan. When you tired it shows in your actions. You light a fire and make things happen.

heart shaped candle

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

You don’t like your weight? Light a fire. Don’t sit around talking bad to yourself. Get up and use that idle time to work out. I used to work out to Khloe Kardashian’s “Revenge Body.”  This was after dropping weight. Sometimes I would listen with my ear phones on but it motivated me to move more. It motivated to see the reasons why I gained the weight and work on the inside out. I no longer sit talking about my arms is getting big, I light the fire and work on them. If my thigh or any other part of my body is bothering me I get to work on them.

You don’t like your relationship? Work on you actively and in addition suggest couples counseling while you get personal counseling. He/she unwilling to attend, you have your answer. Faith without works is dead you can’t simply pray good behavior into another individual. Either love is worth fighting for the right way or it has to be set aside. I fail to believe that all this living to be done is meant to be spent arguing and being miserable with an individual who doesn’t mean you well.

firetwo8

I know the number one issue with lighting a fire is depression. That is why things like bad jobs, weight, relationships, and goals seem hard to achieve because you have allowed your mindset to take over. Your mind has made a nest of negativity and you don’t have the mental strength to move. Well your first light of fire needs to be a certified counselor or therapist. It will be hard. I hate when people paint happy pictures of people attending therapy. But all that bad has to come out. Often times you leave hurt. You leave empty. Its a process, but one that is worth the journey. What do you have to lose? Everything-like a fire!

Whatever you need today, light a fire. Get up off of your do nothing and take a few steps. Make a few calls. Send out a few hundred resumes but get the fire started. Every day you should be doing something to ignite fire in your life and in your soul. So light up the gifts inside of you, work on you, and make life happen. The only excuse you have is you. So stop making them. Get back into life and light a fire in your soul to make life beautiful!

Chapter 38: Birthday Message

I’m so grateful to see my 38th year! What an honor it is. A lot of people didn’t wake up today and for that I am grateful! It’s the final day of Toibration!! My personal new year to reset and refocus!!

I’ve learned a lot about myself. My goal is to be more accepting of my life. I want to love me to the moon and back. I want to exude confidence and strength that looks past physical barriers or emotional struggles. Let’s be honest, we all have them. There are days when I wake up smiling and eager but there are other times where anxiety or just life awaits and it’s hard to push through. If I could wake up, and try I’m half way there.

I’m going to be honest I probably hear more negativity from my own voice and thoughts. Often times I judge myself harshly. You add comparison and the world and it can lead to a downward spiral. This year I have proven to master myself more. Everyday through self-care I push! I’m not going to stop working hard on my body, and mind. I’m going to keep working out even when I hear people judge every part of what they think I should be. I’ve learned that I don’t have to be like the miserable folks who sit and point from a miserable heart. I have to be sure my heart is right and I have the right response.

Relationships

I am going to make a lot of changes in how I allow others around me to move at my expense. I’ve cut back on half the things I’ve done for others because I’ve learned it’s okay to put my needs first. It’s okay to make sure my cup is full! I have learned it’s okay but to end bad vibes and people with bad intentions. I also put into perspective how I nurture those around me.

Also shout out to Marques! Another year of loving. Another year of patience! It’s been a whirlwind! I pray more strength to stand by one another!

We have had a great year filled with highs and some unforeseen lows. I’ve wondered how we were going to push through. I’ve questioned the paths we have taken but not your loyalty. I know that when I dig under your skin you still have remained vigilant in keeping the promise you made me in the car in the driveway a few years ago to work through. You took hits for me that I couldn’t!

Twin Power

I didn’t come into this word alone. My twin Tierra means the world to me. She is my first friend. Contrary to sound belief I am going to always be in her corner. If you see us fighting or arguing don’t jump in because we are liable to start fighting you! We are close. We speak daily. I am aware of most things in her life. There’s nothing that could separate that love!

Happy birthday twin!

Blog Love

Between TCP and my this blog, life has opened up! I am grateful! I’ve stepped up and become consistent. With that it’s opened up doors that I never imagined. I prayed for days like this and to walk in it is humbling. I look forward to the many opportunities that are on the horizon. I’ve had some amazing adventures this year from theatre, the zoo, amazing food and drinks and everything else in between. Thank you to each and every reader! You make this worth it!

Lifestyle Changes

I’ve made amazing choices. I’ve become vegan and it’s working for me! I am continuing to work hard on my body and goals! I am more determined to keep pushing. I also am dedicated to running more races this year! So far 2 down and 4-5 more to go! I’m not stopping. It makes me happy! It keeps me calm and relieves stress!

Mom Life

My goal as a mom is to be solid. To give them what THEY need. I pray to be more calm. To be more understanding in this 38th year. I am soon to celebrate my oldest being 10! It’s a milestone. I love my children and it’s always a pleasure to be their mom. For every trinket I make for them and every memory we create, I feel like the blessing has been all mine. They bring me joy! I pray when they look back on their childhood it was about love, fun, lessons and peace!

So many goals this year to make happen! So many goals I’m actively crushing. No one is to say what will transpire but in these last few years of my 30s, I plan to dust myself and push harder and work smarter.

I promise to rest when necessary

I promise to schedule more days of magazine reading and podcast listening

I promise to continue buying my own flowers and practicing more self care

I promise to say no without explanation

I promise to work this body so it can continue to be there for me

Year 38 I see you. Some folks didn’t make it and won’t make it but I promise no matter the choices good or bad to stand in it!

Shout out to Go Vegan Philly for the amazing shoot cake pictured below that I almost ate before getting my shots. My favorite fruit is strawberry and that frosting was almost too much to handle!  Thank you for always delivering quality tasting food and having my taste buds on a 1000!!!! I’ve said it once and I will say it again-you can Go Vegan and have amazing taste. You like what I did there? So hit them up for all of your vegan goods! They are also selling items at Martindale’s Natural Market

cake.jpg

Happy Birthday to me!! Let’s do this!

 

Philly Zoo: WildWorks something to flip about…

I had an amazing time at the Philadelphia Zoo! I know I’m like a resident there, but today I zip lined at WildWorks, an interactive aerial adventure for all ages.

Yes from the little kids to the big kids aka adults, not one of us left with sad faces. 34 feet off the ground of pure exhilaration is what I experienced. If you have been following the blog you know that Philadelphia Zoo has had major change ups offering more than just cute animals in their habitats but a whole shake up of encouraging patrons to be fit all the way around.

From the new eateries such as the Urban Green to WildWorks, the Philadelphia Zoo keeps everyone towards a healthy lifestyle while you learn about the animals. In alignment with a fit lifestyle, Independence Blue Cross has partnered to bring WildWorks to life. I had the honor among other media outlets to attend the grand opening of the interactive aerial exhibit.

Dan Hilferty, CEO of Independence Blue Cross

The aerial interactive park, is a great time and will get you and the kids moving and excited. All we heard from everyone is squeals of laugher! You can visit the zoo, eat great food with amazing choices, walk and get your steps and have fun with family and friends and now with WildWorks you can experience an aerial play park that is nothing you have ever seen. It makes your zoo trip that much more meaningful and definitely an upgrade from your past zoo experience.

Ribbon cutting ceremony

WildWorks is available as a separate ticket. Zoo admission is not required. Pricing for the 20-25 minute activity ranges from $4.00 to $10.00. The Zoo is also offering an unlimited attractions pass per day for $18.00 to $20.00 each. For more information, pricing and tickets, visit, WildWorks