Sunday Message: Don’t Ignore the Message

So today I went to church. As a PK aka a preachers kid I have been in many of churches in my time.  However today’s church was an experience.

While in church there was a mother with 3 kids-2 girls and 1 toddler boy. The toddler was running around in church not listening and the mother thought it was cute. I thought I or the other nearby mothers was going to grab her let alone the child. The priest as it was a Catholic Church had already called her out for the busy child. He suggested she take the child out but she ignored the message. As she ignored the message the child kept running, kept screaming, kept being a distraction to everyone around him.

See I love the kids. I have 3 of my own and although they are not perfect anytime they are so loud and distracting to everyone around it’s been time for me to step in but she ignored the message. She didn’t want to hear that her little angel was bad. She didn’t want to adhere to maybe he needed a time out. The embarrassment wasn’t enough to get out of her seat to the point that when the child was on the altar the second time she sent her oldest who appeared to be younger than my 8 year old to get him. 

I was irritated beyond belief. Like come on now mother, get your baby. Ignoring him wouldn’t stop the whole church from looking at you. It wouldn’t stop the stares, the huffing or the eye rolls. As I wanted to snatch the mother myself I had to practice self control. If I would have reacted what would have been the point?! Yes we all could have been able to hear but the reality is this little boy is a probably an issue no matter where they go. If the priest directly called her out and she didn’t care to change surely my words wouldn’t have done much.

How many of us have had life say stop, or don’t proceed and we ignore it? So I didn’t stop my eye rolls but I did get calmer than I was when the child first started out. No doubt the mother and child was the talk on everyone’s ride home. The priest even told her good luck at the end. Ignoring the things in your life that is sticking out, or out of place sometimes isn’t enough. You can go to the doctors get a bad report with suggestions and still live life like you’re fine. You ignore the message until things are so out of pocket with limited change. You can date a man who you just caught in the very act and instead of setting him free, you make excuses and simply ignore the message. 

So what, just like that child is trying to get your attention? Whatever that area of your life is that is talking loud enough for you and others to see and hear, deal with that. I can’t snatch that child but I can snatch my life and get it in order. Snatch your life too!! 

Fall Frenzy 

So today’s weather was amazing. The sun was shinning and to put it lightly it was hella hot. So other than watching my son’s soccer game, the Storr family headed to the Fall Fest.  


Fall Fest has turned into a yearly indulgence. This year the whole family attended as I have been known to take the kids and have a great time.  My husband is not a fan of outdoor events. I used to get super upset but nope I will pack the kids and continue with my plans. He came along and from the looks of it he may have had a good time.  There are a lot of activities for the whole family. From oversized games such as Connect Four, to Chess to singing for the kids and of course Fall favorites such as Fall beer flavors and all the comfort food you can have.  I elected to make a Whole Foods stop before attending to cut down on eating too many comfort foods. Plus I wanted to see how low the prices had actually dropped there.  I know you know Whole Foods has merged with Amazon. I was pleasantly surprised.  

However there is always room for a little beer and I made sure I had at least one and I enjoyed the hell out of it. My goal was to just get out, enjoy the weather, and spend some time with my family and the goal definitely achieved. 


As Fall approaches it’s going to be important and find free events in your city to attend. This event was free besides the food and drinks. For me all it cost was less than 30 for a full day of fun. Well worth it if you ask me. 

Enjoy all of the Fall activities you can!! 

Sunday Message: Happy National Grandparents Day!

So it’s national grandparents day. A day to say thank you to all of the grandparents for the things they have done. Salute to all awesome grandparents. Being a grandparent from my perspective of watching my own can be a very great ordeal. As a parent you work hard to establish boundaries and spend so much time raising kids but grandparents have already done it so often times they can be a wealth of knowledge, love, support, and fun times.

I want to send a message to heaven to my mother in law who was an awesome grandmother to my 3 kids. She always had their best intentions in mind. She loved on them as their own. She gave them all she could.  So today in her absence we honor her. My kids adore her and her not being here is still affecting them. However with the crazy times she and I had the one thing I am super glad that although not ideal living with her gave my kids the best time with her. Love you Mom Mom.

Grandparents are such a stepping stone to life. However let’s talk about relationships that aren’t so glittery with grandparents. Sometimes it’s an extension of torn relationships with parents. I know of parental issues that trickle down to kids causing generational struggles. Not every grandparent has memories with their grand kids where cookies are being made or sweaters knitted. Sometimes there are constant fights and struggles that keep relationships stagnant. These fights can put a hamper on a relationship and make them non existent. Both kid and grandchild loses!

Listen there are grandparents that are in their 30s who still club and go out and don’t even see themselves as a grandparent. Thus the term glammom is now a thing. Grandparents don’t look like big momma anymore. It’s not my place to judge.  However coming from someone who had that big momma spirit in her life it’s important. Grandparents should teach you by example. They don’t usually have to yell and act as a parent.  You usually want to glean from their wisdom. Big momma was the foundation of a family even when grandfather was there. 

I do want to shout out my great grandparents who were the ones who gave me extra cake. They took me fishing and showed me how to plant a garden.  They let me stay up late to watch tv just as long as I was up and ready for church on Sunday.  I’ve never met more genuine people like my great grand grandparents. They prayed for me and loved me and on me as long as I could remember. I can still hear their voices calling me their sweet baby. I don’t even know how many of us there were but trust me it’s a lot of us and the number is still growing. They gave us collective and individual love. Thank you Mom and dad who allowed us the Summer to spend with them. Those memeories I cherish in their earthly absence. 

I also want to shout out my grandparents as well. Let’s start with my mom’s Mom who helped raise us. She is one of the people I can call who will not judge me. Her love is unconditional. If I called her and said I had a body she wouldn’t even blink and would know what to do. Her conversations are rough and to the point and she doesn’t sugar coat.  This is most likely why my Mom is to the point like I am. However I remember having the best spaghetti this world has ever had. I have great memories with her.  I’m glad she’s still here to continue making more. My kids call her GG!!

Also to my dad’s parents who are great too. I was in a car accident in 2001 where I dislocated my left shoulder. I had to stay with my grandparents who lived a mere few houses away from my parents so I can sleep in their reclining chair.  My grandfather woke up all through the night to get me medicine and we would eat black cherry vanilla icecream just he and I with his famous homemade cake. This was nightly. I was feeling some type of way when I knew my icecream runs would stop and I had to go back to Penn State.  Oh and my grandma makes the best rice. They both have had their times when they went out of their way to make sure something I needed was taken care of.

To my parents who I love. They are grandparents to 5 and I hold my breath on that number. However Hanmom (my oldest couldn’t say grandma when she was a baby and now the name has stuck with the rest) and dad dad as they are called do great things with all of the kids. Just the summer they turned their yard into a slip and slide and all summer long there wasn’t a cookout that wasn’t had.  Christmas is super fun with all of the kids ripping presents, eating food, and having the best cousin time. Memories are being made.  I hope when they look back at their child hood that they too will have great memories especially now that my parents are the only grandparents they have between my husband and I. I am only speaking on them as grandparents as my kids still have their set of great grandparents from my dad and mom’s side still here as well. 

My hope is that for the estranged grandparents and there are many, to make it right with your kids or attempt. As much as I hear that things should be in the past the real reality is that you have to deal with the past to move forward. You can’t simply throw it under the rug or act like it’s not a big deal just because you don’t want to deal. There are grandkids who have never met their grandparents because of that reason.  

To the surrogate grandparents aka the honary grandparents who has shown extreme love to someone that they have invited you into their heart, salut!! You have no idea what that says about your character as a person. I am not one who takes in people often but when I do they have to be so dope of a person that I feel I would be losing not to take them in as my own. I have been fortunate to meet some of those awesome people.  Their value is amazing. If someone calls you grandma or grandfather especially if not by birth walk in that beautiful calling. 

To all grandparents near and far even the ones in heaven ToiTime salutes you!!  Enjoy your day!!

Camp is Over, Lessons were learned

Yay I do apologize for all of the parents who weren’t able to get your children into camp. This blog is not meant to stir up any ill feelings you had having to scramble for your little people.  I feel your pain in that would have led me into pure anxiety.  However I just want to do a dance that camp is over.  Trust and believe it’s not just that the start of school is literally around the corner, it has everything to do with what camp has meant for the Storr household.

My son was in another daycare and with that daycare they have a built-in camp.  He didn’t make it quite to his first full year.  The issue is simple, he was having issues adjusting. He was having issues with some of the kids and that’s all I will say to protect the innocent. However as a parent it was hard having to find alternatives for him.  I had to take him to counseling at some point which worked out since towards the end he was adjusting to life without his grandmother since her passing.  With all that was going on, I personally have to admit, I didn’t remove him in enough time.  Shocker I know. I battled taking him from the daycare because it was convenient for me to take him and his sibling to school and me to work.  The agony of having to start the process of locating another new school made my head hurt.  So I feel that my husband who took my lead and I just didn’t pull the trigger.  That is the one thing to date I regret.

Let me remind you that the very first daycare he was in since he was a baby discharged him and his siblings because they had contracted hand, foot and mouth virus which is a super common virus usually contracted in daycare go figure.  He never got over being in his mind thrown in the second daycare to be honest.  I don’t even ride past that old daycare anymore to avoid the why did she let us go questions.

In the turn of events, since not being enrolled in either daycare, my son has bounced back.  So in my mom heart, it has given me such a calm.  I went from getting calls daily because of my son’s responses to what was happening to none.  Not like a call but it wasn’t bad nope, to NONE.  Let me tell you how happy that has made me feel within itself.  He is back to enjoying going back to camp or as he calls it school since he starts kindergarten next week.  He smiles when you pick him up.  He is excited about all of the trips.  But it’s now coming to an end today.  It was great for him to have this positive experience before he starts school next week.

Let me say and make clear, I do not place blame at the previous daycare at all.  The first one I simply do not have anything positive to say on their behalf.  However the second one just wasn’t a good fit and if I be honest it wasn’t a good full fit for our family in the long run.  The reason is simple the second my son after a few months hadn’t adjusted I should have pulled him.  As a mom I should have set myself to the side on it and followed his cue.  It would have saved time and energy but we all live and learn.

Camp has done both he and his oldest sibling super well.  One its been a great peace not having to pay for field trips in addition to his tuition weekly.  Lawd, trying to keep straight who goes where and spending money for all is a lot in itself.  This camp provided all of that with the tuition and all the kids had the same things except if there was an allergy issue.  Do you know how much of a mom win that is?  A huge one.  So they won me over right from the start. Was it more money?  Absolutely.  But like my husband and I say you get what you pay for.  So we adjusted.  the kids had a blast.  Some of their trips I was kind of jelly over.  They really had a good time and not one provider did I have an issue with. That is a blessing.  Camps and daycare cost too much to deal with bad attitudes and bad vibes.  I tell people all the time, the ones who keep our children so we can work have hard jobs.  However this is something that you choose.  If you get to a point as a daycare worker or teacher and you heart isn’t in it, its time to renew your mind or find a new career.  This coming in and out snubbing parents, acting passive aggressive, or just altogether rude, will not cut in this field.  This goes for administrators too. You have to either love what you do, take a break, or keep it moving.  Nobody should have to come into your place of business and especially if they are paying for their kids to attend to deal with your nasty attitude either.

Here are a few things I want to highlight as we end camp and go into the school year:

  1. Know your money has power.  Although in daycare kids come and go, never forget that you are still paying for a service.  If you don’t like it, give notice and find somewhere else to go.  It’s simple.  You don’t have to argue.  Know your own money power and do what you have to do.
  2. Along with money power know the background and this is really for other camps and daycare.  A lot of camps have parents and families who run off of government assistance.  I am not knocking it, but never treat others better than or worst because of it.  Just because of a subsidy they have the same buying power.  Keep in mind that to the ones who pay cash can sometimes keep your daycare afloat if the government furloughs. Government has and will furlough again and if that happens it’s sometimes the cash paying clients are the ones that take the sting off behind the scenes.  How do I know this, my twin has been in the field since we were 18, we are now 36 I know a lot more than I let people believe.
  3. You can make a grievance with the daycare and if they don’t hear you, they are governed by laws that they have to uphold.  In Pa there is a star system and anything done that doesn’t align to that system that the daycare is on can be reported and you don’t have to simply take what they give you.  They can’t retaliate against you or withdraw your child.  Always check with the department of welfare or the state to see if the daycare has had any violations.  This is your duty as a parent and your right to do so.
  4. Find a daycare that has everything in writing especially for how they will handle instances of bullying or behavioral.  If you do not you will be battling air.  The reason is without these practices in writing daycare and camps can do as they please and you will only be able to complain or make static if they don’t abide by the laws.  Most daycares will abide by the law but not by a moral and human standard if they don’t feel as if things weren’t an issue.  Trust me.
  5. Never sign a non disclosure agreement if you leave.  Don’t sign it.  Get a copy if they ask you to and take it to an attorney.  I can’t even think why they would have one but trust and believe I keep an attorney on stand by and I will sign Donald Duck before I sign my name to some trash like that.  Daycares and camps run off a word of mouth for the most part.  Sorry not sorry.  We are talking about human lives. How the facility acts when things are less than stellar speaks about how they truly run.  I for one think others need to be cautious and asking those who was there if you have the ability to do so is key.
  6. If you are ever in a position where you don’t get along with administration even if its one or more of the persons in charge, made the decision if you are willing to stay with all things the same.  In other words, if the person (s) you do not get along can you deal with that for the sake of your child.  Sometimes you can and other times you can’t.  You should never feel like you are stuck.  IF you do, your child will pick up on that resentment.  If I am honest I know my kids have done so and looking at the situation I may or may not be sorry about that. I wrote about vibes and for me vibes matter.  I have had bad vibes with a person and how that person continues to act may suggest if I should correct the issue or let it go and move on.
  7. Do not allow your child to do something that you didn’t sign for.  For instance the Summer has been filled with drowning deaths.  One event comes to mine with the daycare from the South who was supposed to hike but then took the kids swimming and the child drowned and died.  This type of stuff infuriates me.  Do not send home a permission slip, get permission from the parent to do that activity and change without notifying and getting permission from the parent.  That was a free nugget for any daycare or camp.  This is a huge lawsuit waiting to happen. Even more there is a family that is experiencing life without the life of a child who could still be here had they followed the laws and rules.
  8. Do not be afraid to find another camp, daycare or school.  Listen as we go into the school year, my kids have the privilege to go to private school, with that we literally mean business when it comes to their education, and how much we spend and what we expect.  We do over and beyond on all fundraisers, attend all meetings, engage all year without a parent teacher conference, attend all parties, come to all functions, and pay our fees during the year as asked I literally will put up with ZERO foolishness from administration.  We mean zero.  No one has to chase us to be involved with our kids lives and with that in mind I demand that the school hold up their end of the bargain at all times.  There is no pat on the back for what we do and neither will it be for those who teach them.  So we all have to be held accountable.

I want to shout out the second and last daycare/camp for the time they have had with my children.  As we transition into the next phase of our children’s journey, there is no hard feelings whatsoever but its time to continue down the path of excellence.  The kids have been super happy and that makes us super happy as parents.  This blog was not a means to air out any grievances.  This blog is to empower parents to never forget your power when dealing with daycare, daycare providers, camps, or schools.  Just because for those who work, and having someone to keep our kids is a must, doesn’t mean you have to take junk just to get through.  You were in control the minute you signed the contract and you are in control until you discontinue the relationship.  I hope that this blog gets you engaged on what some providers will do, what you don’t have to tolerate, and why you need to be on the lookout for in the future.  If you are fortunate to have someone who you trust keep your kids, do not let your guard down just because they are family or friends either.  Be vigilant in what you need, what importantly your kids needs, and realize that business is business and the business of healthy, happy, and engaged kids is most important.  Lastly trust your gut, and listen to your child.  Do not do what I did and air on caution for yourself.  Trust yourself.  Goodbye to Summer Camp but come through 2017/2018 school year!!

Sunday Message: Bouncing Back

Good Sunday morning to you. I hope that you are doing well and have had a chance to have a great weekend thus far. Today I want to talk about bouncing back. In order to bounce back from something you have to go through something. This would include all of the things you feel you have failed, the things you feel you haven’t or won’t accomplish, and the times you have felt the most defeated. There is hope in what you are going through. The message of what you will learn may not reveal itself in the beginning but if you continue to walk and push it will reveal itself. 

Looking back at what you have done or should have done can cripple you.  Over thinking what your life should look like can be empowering only if you keep actively pushing towards your goals. Often times if you’re looking back even for a second you can allow your mind to get stuck and then it takes time to bounce back. 

The trick of bouncing back is to move ahead and knowing that if you move ahead over time you will see the goodness or the positivity in what once had you in your feelings or being in the “dumps.” Life happens to all of us. I have been in low places a lot of times. I didn’t always have an answer. There were times I cried. I actually am not a huge crier but when life smacks you crying may be a form of release that is necessary. There has been times when I felt like I was walking blindly. I have felt like I would die or just end up in my most miserable state. 

What can you do until you bounce back? 

1. Work on what you can fix. 

We spend too much time worrying about what we can’t change that we stay stagnate on what we can. Life is going to happen around you and will not stop because you need a minute. Take a deep breath and make things happen. 

2. Stay Centered 

This may mean working out physically, not stopping plans you have made, not calling off work because you don’t feel emotionally well, staying around positive filled people, or keeping your health a priority. 

3. Don’t quit 

It’s like the days of undergraduate when I told you I got my first F on an exam. I called my mom dying in my mind, ugly crying and feeling ready to pack my stuff and leave. I would have missed out on the great education and great relationships over one defeated moment. Grant it yes I was a straight A student, but my little perfectionist self needed that blow. That blow taught me I was in the big leagues. It taught me little girl this isn’t easy straight, let’s work and balance your social life. I had to fail to succeed. 

Bouncing back will happen naturally when you stop letting the feel of failing gripe you. You can be human and fall apart for 24 hours but after that is over it’s time to wash your face physically, mentally, and emotionally and see what you can do to prevent this and then get up.  If you don’t get up and let it overtake you, what you failed in is no longer the issue it’s the giving in that is the problem. 

So whatever it is whether it’s the feeling of never finding love, not being in a job that serves you or your passion, a marriage or relationship on the brink of no return, or stepping on the scale and seeing it go up and not down, you can and will bounce back. 
Happy Sunday today even if your Sunday looks emotionally cloudy!!  Make the best of your day! 

It’s a Vibe

So welcome back to getting our lives together. We have gotten past the solar eclipse and for those of us who haven’t burned our eyes, its time as it always is to set things right. Vibes matter. I am a firm believer that people send vibes whether they are positive or negative all the time. The thing is not in receiving or giving out of the vibes but what to do once the signal is presented.
For instance I definitely do NOT make my kids go beyond their comfort level in how they interpret vibes. Growing up parents made their kids hug a cousin, aunt, grandparent, etc. I think it’s a sign of respect or at least that is what I was made to believe. However I do not force my kids to hug or be around others simply based on their title. The reason is there is a lot of people who don’t always deserve to have their bad vibes given a stamp of approval. I feel like my kids know how someone made them feel and if they don’t want to show love or attention to someone based on that they shouldn’t have to be made to. Now can my kids disrespect an elder? Nope not one bit. However if an elder is feeling disrespected due to my kids not wanting to engage than I would speak up for them. It’s my job to let the elder know to either give them a chance to warm up, or when they feel up to it they will or they won’t. I have been challenged on this thought process but its fine. My kids, my rules. How do I teach my kids to trust their instincts than make EVERY decision on what that looks like? That makes no sense.

I have gone to someone’s home and had the receiving friend or family member start hollering and not in a demeaning way towards my kids and wonder why my kids are just looking at them. My kids are naturally loud but they do not always gravitate to loud people. My youngest for instance is not the one for that. She will play mute and you can be in her direct face. The reason for her feelings I believe is her ability to feel you out. If she is feeling you and 9 times out of 10 she’s not, she won’t force it and I generally just watch over her in those regards. I have had people who don’t realize that if my kids don’t interact with you regardless of title you are a stranger or they may treat you like one. So with any stranger they are looking for my input to see if the person is a person they can let their guard down. My oldest is the one who I watch the absolute most. She is one who likes everyone no matter what. She has no fear of talking to anyone. I watch her because she hasn’t learned discernment. In her world, everyone means her well and that’s not the case. My middle child, he is pretty mellow if I don’t alert him or if he doesn’t feel unsafe he generally will be fine. All of three of them have to learn what vibes mean to them and how to interact beyond what I desire them to be in a situation and beyond what elders who want them to perform do.

What happens to my kids as they matriculate to adulthood and find someone they don’t vibe with? I would hope they would continue to show respect to others even if the person is someone they don’t agree with. That’s life. Respect on the surface should always be the first thing extended to all UNLESS they have shown themselves to be a problem and in that case, a good hi and bye works wonders. However as an adult I don’t stay in the presence of bad vibes. The second people are acting out-of-pocket, I find ways to make sure I don’t let those vibes transfer to me. I don’t need to give someone a bad attitude just because someone else is doing the same. I will cut off a bad conversation in a minute. I will pull back until either the offender has changed or if the season of friendship has ended let it fade naturally. The issue is that with vibes which can be transferred if you’re not careful is knowing who you are and what your standards are.

Another issue that parents have to wonder about, is those who harm children and do things to them that isn’t right. Newsflash, they are generally in your circle and not strangers. For that alone I allow my kids to determine who they vibe well with. How do I know that the one I am pushing them to hug is the one who made them uncomfortable? I have to speak to them and allow them to know it’s okay to not want to be in someone’s face and if someone is making them uncomfortable as children, they have every right to retreat. They have a right to say no. But wait, its aunt so and so right? No aunt so and so may not realize the last interaction they had didn’t set well with them. They may need time to adjust or find out if they want to be in aunt so and so’s presence. They can say hello to them and then figure it out. I give hi and byes to strangers, it cost me nothing. However vibes cost me my time if I keep allowing them in my circle.

How much more for adults? These are lessons that many adults don’t conquer. You stay connected to people based on their title. So the person who is sending you bad vibes you know you need to distance yourself but you are afraid of what they will think. You tell others about how you need to distance yourself but when the courage comes to do so, you revert back to a child like mentality and stay. You leave their presence feeling more wounded, hurt, discouraged, etc and wonder why you can’t do better for yourself and for the relationship that has every sign that it needs to end. It’s called knowing when YOU feel a bad vibe and then following through to make sure you do what’s right for YOU. You can control for the most part what vibes you allow. When I am at work and bad vibes are popping off that is when I have to know my environment and adjust myself and NOT allow the foolishness to get to me. It’s called being in control of yourself. When you are in a place where you can get up and go a little more freely, than do so. We especially in these times have to learn to be in the presence of those who celebrate you and not to depend emotionally on bad vibes. Bad vibes can become something that you are used to so you settle. You ever see an abused person stay with their abuser not because they don’t know its wrong but because they are used to it? The same came happen in our everyday lives. Vibes matter. They matter more now than ever. People are doing the most whether it’s for love, political reasons, etc I have been around those who only ask for money every other second. SO when I see them I just say hey how are you and move along. Why? I don’t need to entertain why you are being a part of broke phi broke EVERY time I see you. You ALWAYS need something you can’t give. You want to take from my resources but can’t nobody ever depend on you to be on time. Retreat. Stop giving. Just fall back on the relationship. Allow that person to become their own source or let them find someone else do to it for them. Those types of vibes are draining.

Vibes need to be consistently checked. You decide what vibes and who they are associated with to either continue or not. Trust your instincts. Trust yourself. It’s okay to not know and take a break to figure things out. Respect all from the jump. Respect means also I can love you from a far and not allow you access to me. I need to keep my vibes clear and so do you. Check the vibe.

Life Lessons from a Former Stay at Home Mom

Listen having a child is a Christmas miracle. It is not to be taken for granted. Every time I hear of a Mom who lost their life-giving birth it hurts my heart. Women and their bodies go through the most to bring forth children that you hope will be productive citizens.

As a former stay at home mom I got lost many days. Between food on my clothes and wipes in my hand I had no idea what days were what at times. I learned so much about myself that I thought I had mastered until I was home with tiny humans who needed me for everything and I STILL apply the lessons to this day.  Even if you don’t have kids these are all lessons we can gleam from:

1. Time outs are not just for kids

Yes it’s okay to take a mental time out. I found I got mine when the kids went down for a nap. Now that I am back to working full-time I find that I have to push to get a time out but they are super necessary. You need to sometimes unplug and catch your breath. Life throws curb balls and in order to be ready I need a clear mind. Take a break and catch your sanity.

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2. Keep yourself fabulous

This is hard in this age at times as body issues and time can sometimes not be on our side but the years I spent complaining about what I looked like I could have done better by getting my entire life together. Listen in my stay at home days I couldn’t afford nail and salon appointments so I had to get creative. There are alternatives but keeping yourself “up” isn’t about a spouse or the world. It’s about you. It’s also for the little people who are watching you and taking in what you say and more of what you do. Hard times don’t have to show up in our appearance. My mother and I lived in a shelter and everyday she spoke over us to not look like where we lived. Has anyone not known we didn’t even look displaced. That takes strength even with your strength is depleted. Thank you Mom for that lifetime jewel.

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3. Exercise your NO muscles

Do you know how many times you have to tell a child no? Too many to keep track. Why do you get as an adult and feel like you on a yes choir?! No is powerful and one of the first words we learn as a child but is sometimes the hardest to exercise.  Your no is valuable but you have to use it. NO you can’t get up and do for another able-bodied adult. NO you can’t be used today. NO you can’t be a punching bag physically or mentally. NO! Use it! It will save you time, stress, and heartache.

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4. Have a plan and work a back up plan

All moms know what I mean when you have a toddler with a soiled outfit but no extra outfit. In life you will need the same plan. Things fall but you don’t have to fall with it. Failure isn’t failure until you give up or in whichever you allow first. Get up and work!

5. Don’t sweat the small stuff

Life is life.  Its designed to change at a moment’s notice.  Do not waste your energy or time on things that you can’t change.  Unless you are a breastfeeding mom, don’t cry over spilled milk.  If you take the hurt and pain to channel that into positivity your day will be that much better.

There are times when life will be super rough. Like 3.36 in your account, Ramen noodle eating, marriage on the brink, need a vibrator, and deadlines at work type of tough.  It will seem to be closing in at any given moment. However it’s not what’s happening to you that is the issue it’s what you allow in your response that matters. Get up, get dressed, care about life, work your plan, back it up and if your back is against the world well stand and make something happen.