Listen there are a number of folks that do not like me. I am okay with it. The feeling may even be mutual. However what I won’t tolerate is mistreatment of kids whether they mine or not. Kids will forever be off-limits for eva. I don’t understand why any adult thinks it’s okay to involve kids in the midst of adult issues?! Besides kids is the inability for those who like to start issues and play mannequin when you don’t want to deal with their excuse of “that’s how I am” anymore, be vigilant.
I’ve had some bold ones use the excuse of that’s just how so and so is. I’m looking at them like ok ma and? (In my Jayz voice) Just because you are of a certain age is not the prerequisite to be disrespectful. I know the older you get the more your give a care is alerted, but out right nastiness is not going to be tolerated in this day and age when folks is trying to be on the do better. Be aware of those who won’t change and meet you in the middle especially when they are the culprit or the initiator of an issue. My mom used to say they “throw rocks and hide their hands.”
These are the same types of folks that get amnesia after they have done something and can’t understand why you don’t want to deal with them. They will make themselves the victim after offering up a petty apology and then tell others that at least they said sorry. Watch them. They are the same ones who generally are found in drama. Remove yourself from them.
If that’s how you are and you’re:
These are the some of the things I don’t want to just deal with! It’s not up to me as a receiver to deal with. This is a personal issue that you can leave alone and force those around you to either take or take off. You don’t get to spew foolishness on others and then hide behind that’s apart of personality and dare someone to stick with you when you aren’t attempting to change!
Let me say I found this hard lesson a few years ago within myself. I had to come to grips even when the mirror was being held to me from a source I could have easily dismissed. I had to realize that the person’s tactics was wrong in their delivery but the truth was in the middle. So I separated myself and did my own work. Sometimes it takes that to get things right. However continuing to defend my own bad behavior or those around me isn’t being accountable either.
Be accountable for you! You know what was said about you was true! You know you have things that rub folks the wrong way in your home and outside of your home. Your personality can take you places and it can also deny you entry to places as well. Be honest with yourself. My mom always said “everyone ain’t telling the same lie.” So if you’re hearing recurring messages about you, it may be time to take inventory.
Do not be discouraged. It will hurt when you accept the things about yourself. But push through it. Trust me when you do stop taking excuses from yourself its super easy to hold those around you to the same standards. When I hear excuses I just mark people. I realize they aren’t at the point of receiving. I don’t necessarily cut them off about it until their behavior becomes toxic. Once it becomes toxic I don’t have to entertain it on the strength of any relationship.
I’ve been reading blogs by other bloggers about toxic mothers lately. These are men and women who believe that their mothers are toxic. I don’t think there is a higher relationship outside of a love interest on Earth than a mother. If people are willing to separate the toxicity that a mother can bring I think you can separate from a friend, associate, coworker or any other family relationship. No one is worth your peace. No one is worth that level of stress.
We have to be careful of what we project. Sometimes you can mean well and think you are being true to yourself and come off with attitudes, stuck up etc. Being who you want to be is crucial in self-development. If who you are coming off is not what you want others to take away from an interaction with you than it’s time to find a better delivery or do an inward search. Our delivery around certain people could be nervousness. Like when you go on your first date and you’re super nervous and awkward. If it’s that, you can work on it. If you’re always show boating, speaking ill of others, demeaning, or rude that is all about who you are inside. Those things need worked on.
I pray this Sunday message that you look inward and deal so you can deal with those around you. In dealing with those around you do not allow the excuses of “this is just who I am take it or leave,” sway you. You may have to take them up on that offer and simply leave it, and leave them alone. It doesn’t have to be a final chapter close. It could be seasonal. Don’t accept the excuses from yourself or those around you!