Women’s History Month; Cheryl A., an Update

Good day to all.  We have none other than Cheryl A. who is coming back to us with an update.  If you remember we interviewed her on March 3, 2016.  At the time a lot of her goals had not come into fruition.  Let’s see what Cheryl has been up to from 2 years ago.

I wanted to know what she would tell her younger self if she could go back in time:

GO FOR IT..your dreams are never too small.  Take the chance, explore the world, study abroad, go to school in another state or another country.  Be confident, walk with your head high, there is only one you and you are unique. You are not everyone’s cup of tea and that is ok.  Enjoy the people who love you for you.  Failure is a part of life but learn the lesson.   Learn yourself, love yourself, become a whole person.

A recurring theme with all of these blogs are little nuggets on areas such as life, love, and career. These areas are some of the most thought about moments of our lives.  I wanted to know what Cheryl’s take on each:

Life-I could go on and on about this topic! Life has thrown me so many curveballs from death, health issues, relationship drama (friends, family, work, etc..).  Life has taught me to own my stuff.  If you are wrong admit it and resolve it if possible.  However, life has taught me that no matter how much you own your stuff there will always be the naysayers.  Some people just don’t like me and I’ve learned to finally accept that. Gone are the days where I wanted people’s acceptance.  I have learned to live my best life and not live beneath my capabilities to make others comfortable.  I’ve learned to accept the apologies I will never receive.  I’ve learned that verbal abuse and toxic people are real and I will not allow that in my life.  I’ve learned that I do not have to prove my forgiveness.  I’ve learned that no matter what positive changes you make in your life, someone will always hold you to the “I remember when” of your past.  I’ve learned to that people will show you and in my case tell you how they feel about you, through that I’ve learned to be okay with it. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, so I have accepted what I’ve been shown and told and have moved one.  So of course, those relationships ended and some will never start.  I refuse to be in one-sided relationships, so if I’m the one doing all the calling, reaching out, scheduling, etc..that will no longer work for me.  The end of 2017 resonated some things in me and I knew that 2018 had to be different for me. I’m talking different in the way I navigate life and situations.  My circle has always been small, but I am no longer giving front seats to my life nor allowing situations to move me.  I’ve learned to be confident not cocky, humble but not a pushover.  I’ve learned to take my power back. 

So I am sure there were a few things you could have gotten from those words. Think about not giving front seats to those who don’t deserve it.  You go out of your way to be there for others or people have an expectancy that they don’t do in return.  You have to be careful of the energy you give.  You can not operate from an empty cup.  Keep your cup full!

Love-This year will be 10 years of marriage! It’s amazing to even last this long.  My marriage has had its share of troubles over the years and moving 1200 miles within 30 days didn’t make it any easier.  However, I wouldn’t change anything.  Marriage has taught me unconditional love, friendship and compromise.  Yes, marriage takes work but it’s only hard if you make it hard.  I can admit that at times I made things unnecessarily difficult.  See the problem was, I wasn’t my own complete person. I fell into the trap of he has to be this and that to me when reality is I’m responsible for me and my own happiness.  I had the degrees, job, friends, etc…but there was still a void, a void that my husband could not fill nor was it his responsibility to fill.  I had to get real with myself and get to my real issues and deal with them.  The key for me was to take responsibility for myself and God will work everything else out.  Marriage is a commitment, so if you are committed you will face the challenges and do the work to keep that commitment.  Curveballs will be thrown in the form of family, finances, friendships, etc..but you need to pick your battles wisely.  Every battle isn’t worth the fight and some battles are won with silence.  Be mindful of who or what you allow in, everyone or everything doesn’t get an automatic pass because of who are what they are in your life.   There are boundaries that should never be crossed and ultimatums should never be given.

Career-All you need is ONE yes.  It doesn’t matter how many times you hear no, keep on pressing.  If it’s a no, that door is not for you so stop knocking on it.  My journey to a new career took 6 years.  I had faith and I worked my faith, completed many applications, traveled to various cities and states for interviews, did video interviews, essays, tests, etc…and I heard no for 6 years.  Disappointed and frustrated but I pressed on (thanks to the people who supported me and didn’t give up on me when I wanted to give up).  Those 6 years was a process I had to go through, lessons I had to learn.  Relationships that were restored and some that needed to be ended.  I remember my former Pastor, Alex Rivera saying “A blessing too early is a burden.”  I didn’t get it then, but I get it now.  My blessing in my new career was already there and set up by God BUT 6 years ago, I wasn’t mentally, emotionally or spiritually prepared. Being unprepared would have resulted in my blessing being a burden.  So I’m grateful for the journey and the lessons I learned along the way.  I won’t lie and say it’s been smooth sailing, but I will say that when everything is done in order and you embrace the journey and the lessons, it was worth the wait.

She has waited 6 years to step into her dream job.  What will your future look like?

I would like to say retired, but I have 19 years until that happens. I hoping that at least a full girls/my bestie trip will finally happen (YES that was shade)! Seriously, I do plan to work hard to see where this career is going take me. I know I am now in a position with many opportunities and I plan to take advantage of that.  I plan to build both my professional and personal networks. 

As I stated, I was on a new career path that started back in 2011 and didn’t come to fruition until 2017.  You may think the accomplishment is working as a Lancaster County JOP for 12.5 years and now working as a USPO in Miami, Florida is the accomplishment.  In a way it is, but the biggest accomplishment is, that I didn’t give up.  Many times I wanted to throw in the towel and just settle for what was and has been for 12 years.  Comfortability and complacency is easy.  Taking a risk like moving from everything you have always known to a place where you know nothing or no one but your husband.  Not being able to fully embrace the greatness in the career chance because you are questioning is this the right decision? What if it doesn’t work? What if I don’t like it? How do I start over?   Self doubt, fear, worry, etc..starts to creep in…BUT again, I didn’t give up, I just kept pressing through.  So 9 months later, here I am, still pressing through and it has gotten easier with time.

Hubby and I have some business ventures in mind, I won’t go into detail, but they are there and we are committed to seeing them through.  As some know, I am also an Adjunct Professor, I want to get back to as well.  A short term goal I have is to go parasailing and hubby and I are going to concur that on our anniversary trip.

What are your feelings on the #metoo movement?

As a Criminal Justice Professional for almost 14 years, I have been able to provide a non-judgement zone.  I continue to be a listening ear, a liaison and a person of support.

Self love is always my goal for my readers.  How do you practice self love?

Self-love for me is the basics, regular hair appointments, trips to the nail salon, reading to expand my mind and overall enjoying the life that I have been given.  As previously stated, I also avoid drama and toxic people.  It doesn’t matter who you are, if my experience with you has been drama or toxic, you will not be a part of my life. I can be respectful and cordial, but that’s all I have to offer you.  I’ve learned to be okay with whatever is, meaning, if I don’t hear from that person, if I don’t get included, if people talk about me, if people still want to  live in the “I remember when” of my life, I’ve learned to accept it.  Self Love is knowing that I am no longer that person and I love my self enough to know that being tied to the past is contrary to where I am going.  Self Love is embracing those that have shown that despite whatever has transpired they will always be there to support me, lift me up and celebrate me.

Thank you Cheryl for using your voice.  I hope that you are enjoying your new career and I wish you much success!!!



Daily Women Crushers

As we continue to celebrate women’s history month, I want to shout out all women who are crushing their dreams.  Wednesdays are designated as #WCW or women crush Wednesday.  However daily women are failing, dusting themselves off and getting back out there and making it all happen.

Single women who are lonely and longing for relationship and finding ways to enjoy their single days and taking trips, starting businesses, becoming sound individuals without someone in their company. Those are daily women crushers.  They want to be with someone but aren’t allowing the lack thereof to stop them.  Until love finds them, they are out here making life happen for them under their own guidance, salute.

To the married woman who gives daily to her husband and attempting to be united, you are a daily woman crusher.  People think that marriage is a cure-all but it’s not.  It’s hard work to put someone else above your own.  It’s a union that actually makes you confront a lot of who you are or who you think you are.  Marriage is being there for someone and trying to keep the spark going regardless if that woman is tired or not, salute.  FYI the same should be done from her husband towards her.  If you find you are in a one way marriage, there are a few talks you and your husband need to have.

To the mother who is tired and feeling overwhelmed and still continues to get up before her house, getting things in order, and making it look effortless, you are a daily woman crusher.  To the days when those around you takes you for granted, and forget to say sorry or appreciate what you done, salute to you.  Salute to you when you lose yourself and literally have to pick yourself up before you can give again, salute to you.  Salute to you as you endure your body going through hell and back to deliver, salute to you.  Salute to you as you almost sometimes die on those tables waiting to hear that first cry, salute to you.  Salute to the women who have lost life many times and feel like their worth is tied to being a mother and can’t.  We salute you.  Just know that is a real pain. A real fear.  A real cry.  A real emptiness and I stand behind you and with you.

To the business woman who has to have her work checked twice just because she doesn’t have the same “member” as those on her team, salute to you.  Salute to the woman who is making moves after she was denied financing, salute to you.  Salute to the woman whose ideas failed many times before it took off, salute.  Salute to the woman who while accomplishing her goals, had the very folks who now want to stand with her after the fact and those same ones laughed, talked about, and ridiculed for that venture to pop, salute!

To the woman who has or is facing many demons and finding herself alone as she pushes towards getting her life together.  The ones that seem and feel like constant failures while others around her is flourishing.  The ones who say why not me too but they seem to be saying this only to themselves and there is no one around who understands you.  We salute you.  We get it.  We understand because as a woman regardless of what we have all accomplished we have all been public goals and secret failures.  Trust the process, understand that it will work out. Even in the dark, there will be light.  At the second you go to fail, you find a solution. At the moment you decide today is the day you will give up, light shines.  You are purpose and you were created for purpose.  The world has something that you have inside of you.  We salute the process of growing in the dark with limited water and resources.  The best flowers sometimes have thorns but are the prettiest in the end.  Don’t give up!

Women’s Month, Year of the Woman: Stephanie S!

Thank you to the wonderful women who answered the call to be interviewed. It takes a lot to open up about who you are.  You are who you are and this process can be a little intimidating.  Thank you to all of my volunteers.  As women we all have unique situations that vary but collectively we go through much of the same things.  Not just for this month or for the #METOO movement, let’s all bond as one.

Stephanie S., is a mother to two beautiful girls.  Her oldest is actually her niece that she has raised since she was 13 until the age of 18 and her youngest is her biological daughter, she’s 4-years-old.  She’s been with her husband for 16 years and they will be celebrating their 9th wedding anniversary on May 9th.  She’s one of a few in her family to graduate high school and college and have gone onto graduate school.  She still has 3 more classes to go before she graduates. She was laid off in 2015 and found two jobs the following year in 2016, but she’s only working at one of those jobs and couldn’t be more happier.  She is finally in a place that she enjoys where she is currently.
What she would tell her younger self:
The life ahead of you will not be easy, but keep faith in God and trust that He will not give you more than you can handle.  Also, you need to relax more, things will work themselves out in the end. 
Lessons for her daughters:
Nothing in life is truly free.  Be honest, be kind, and the world will be yours. 
Love: Don’t rush into it.  If you truly want to know if your partner is right for you, please don’t be afraid to bring them to meet your father or me. 
Career: don’t settle for comfort.  Find a career that you’re truly passionate about and makes you happy to go to everyday.  In the end, if there’s anything in all three that you feel uncomfortable with, let someone know.  Don’t be afraid to tell anyone.
Our future and where we want to be should be something that we attempt to work at all the time. Nothing is simply going to be handed to us.  I asked where Stephanie sees herself in 5 years:
In a better position at my job.  I love my place of employment, but would like to advance to higher position.
What are the things you have accomplished:
Well, when it comes to personal accomplishments, I’d say, participating in art shows.  I love art and to be able to participate in art shows has been such an honor and a joy to share my own work with others who love art just as much as I do. 
Another personal accomplishment is that I decided to go to grad school to get my Master’s degree.  I haven’t finished my grad schooling yet, but I will soon or at least hope to. 
Career accomplishments, I would say is jumping into a position that no one else wanted and ended up being the best person they had done the job.
I think we tend to hold certain people in high regards.  This #METOO movement has allowed some of the ones we hold high to be seen differently.  No matter who it is, if you have sexually assaulted, harassed or abused another woman regardless of which roles you may have played, how much money you have, even if you are someone’s boss, it’s not okay.
What are your thoughts on the #METOO movement:
To be honest, I didn’t want to believe that some of the things being said about celebrities like Bill Cosby were true, but when you have so many women coming forward, then there must be some truth to the allegations.  It’s great that more women are coming forward and ousting their tormentors/abusers.  Women shouldn’t be afraid to speak out.  Value your self-worth before you value where your career can take you.  I feel my youngest is too young to truly understand what the movement means so I’m unsure of how I plan on using the movement.  The closest thing I can think of to tell my daughter would be, “If you don’t like someone touching you or you feel uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to tell anyone.”
What are the things that Stephanie is looking to accomplish or crush:
The major thing on my heart that I hope to crush is completing my graduate degree.  When I do go back to complete it, I will have to pay for my three classes and I just can’t afford to pay for them right now.  So as soon as I can afford it, then I will complete my degree. 
Lastly what does self-love look like to you:
Accepting myself for who I am.  I am a person who is shy, but is trying to be more vocal when I need to be.  When having a rough day, listening to music every chance I get.  When I’m home, I wait until my daughter is in to bed to sit at my desk and write in my bullet journal or plan things out in my other planners.  And as silly as it sounds, I like to straighten my hair sometimes because it makes me feel good about my looks.  I chose to give up drinking sodas in order to care about my health.  I was drinking sodas to keep my energy levels up especially when I was at work, but I realized that as long as I’m laughing and staying productive at work, my energy is generally high or at a normal level.  Plus, I don’t get headaches anymore.  In place of sodas, I’ve been drinking more water.  Still working on getting to bed at a normal hour, but I will get there in time. 
Stephanie thank you again for participating.  I am sending positive vibes that you will get the funding you need to complete your master’s degree.  Do NOT stop just because you have this hiccup in the road. I hope your daughters know just how smart, how beautiful, how strong you really are.  I hope through your example that others around you will know continue to have purpose and move towards that purpose daily.
Another note if you’re looking for a photographer in central Pennsylvania, take a look at her information:

Women’s Month, Year of the Woman: Erica M!

This Year the theme is the Year of the Woman.  This is not a theme that I made up but is the theme of Woman’s Month all around the world.  We have celebrity women who are speaking up and this is so awesome to have.  Now I feel like I need to give the voice of the everyday woman.  The single mother trying to make ends meet, the married woman trying to balance it all, the career woman trying to make it up the ladder without having to drop her panties along the way, and all of the women in between. Women are beautiful and strong beings.  Like Beyoncé says, we have the kids and get back to business.  Women can do it all, have it all, and this year and beyond are looking out for the next generation so our daughters and granddaughters don’t have to say #METOO!
In addition to that we have to showcase regular women because we have a voice and power too.  We are women who have been married, some divorce, some single, some moms who are all making their marks in this world.  They are giving back to their communities, keeping families together, raising families with and sometimes on their own, completing college, making their and other people around them better.
Erica M.is the oldest of 3 siblings, a single mom of two daughters ages 16 and 13, raising their 19-year-old sister which she considers her my own (oh yes the headaches :).  She currently works for a financial institution going on 23 years and attends college a few months shy of earning her bachelor’s degree in Business Administration with a concentration in hospitality. Erica is a social bean and loves to spend time with family, friends and herself. Yes she enjoys time with herself including scheduling days off to do some of the things she enjoys.
Some times as we get wiser we often think back on the times of our younger days.  We wonder what lessons could we go back and tell our younger selves.  I asked Erica what her lesson would be to a young Erica back in her day:
I would tell my younger self not to rush through life, marriage and family. All these things will come in perfect timing. Enjoy your childhood go play in the park instead of worrying why your parents are fighting. Enjoy being a teenager and do teenager things like hang out with your friends, focus in school and don’t worry about adult things and in your young adult years explore and venture out don’t worry about putting your life on hold for others. 
Being a mom myself I often ask myself during times when I am with them what lessons I want them to get.  My daughters are young so of course I try to keep it in perspective but I asked Erica what she wanted her daughters to know in life, love and career.
Life – It flies by very quickly and has many stages so take hold of the present and worry about tomorrow when it gets here.
Love – Don’t rush, force or look for it because it can lead to failure. Love is natural and will happen when you least expect it. 
Career – Let your heart and passion lead you to career of choice not money. Go hard to be the best in that field regardless of what it is.  
So what has Erica accomplished so far:
  • Purchased her home at the age of 19
  • When back to school during a separation with my then husband
  • Bouncing back from having to file for bankruptcy
  • Having the means to support my daughters alone
  • Working for the same company for 23 years and I am only 40 years old
  • Instilling in my daughters the meaning of faith
  • Working my way up to a Co-lead for a team at church
  • Stayed focused on my weight loss. About a little over a year ago I was a size 24 (extremely tight) and now I am wearing a 18 -20.
First of all congrats on all of your accomplishments Erica! Let me just add from this list, there was failure. You have had to made bad credit decisions to have to file for bankruptcy but…..she now owns a home.  She now can financially support her girls on her own. Did you catch that?  Sometimes we fail but if we KEEP on going, we will come out of top.  So if you are a woman who is struggling with any failed relationship, bad credit or anything that you DEEM negative, the only way it stays that way is if you allow it.  Kudos to you Erica!!
 Even with all of the great accomplishments that Erica has already done, I wanted to know where she sees herself in 5 years:
This is always a difficult question to answer because our vision changes over time but as of right now. I want to see myself in 5 years living for me and not others, in a position of choice with work and not must, and enjoying life with my girls, family, friends and maybe with a new-found love.
Now the #METOO movement is something that didn’t start on the internet.  It started from women getting tired of being sexually abused, harassed or assaulted.  The Internet made it easier for women to band together.  Women have been seen as accessories in times past.  This is why often times they are not believed or if they are to be believed they are seen as the one who agitated their aggressor.  I do NOT want myself or other women and God help me, my daughters to have to say METOO!
I asked Erica what the #METOO movement meant to her:
 The Me Too movement is a great organization that helps those that were or are being sexually assault or harassed. They provide support, ways to speak up and remind you that you are not alone. Finally and hopefully people can start feeling more comfortable in speaking up because they are not alone. I plan on using this movement to reassure my daughters that if they are ever made to feel uncomfortable to please speak up. It is not their fault of someone else’s actions.  
Finally I wanted to know about what the future holds for Erica:
Things that are on my heart that I look forward to crushing is
  • Continue losing weight and getting fit for myself. There are things that I want to do but have weight restrictions. I don’t want to be restricted of nothing I want to do.
  • Work on my bucket list which would lead to enjoying my life
  • Be in a position in my career were there is still passion and have it not be just work
  • Utilizing my event planning skills to plan family trips as family time is so important to me
 Anyone who has been reading my blogs knows I am a huge pusher of self-care.  I want everyone especially my ladies to work from a full cup instead of this notion that they must work until there’s no working in them left.  To keep giving from empty cups and stop caring of what others think about them taking time for themselves.  So Erica, what do you do for self-care:
  • I read a lot of inspirational books such as a Woman’s daily prayer, Too blessed to be stressed, and a moment for your soul. There are many days that I feel down and out, wondering why me, or when will my prince charming come. These books remind me of my purpose now and to remain focus on today.
  • I have a journal that I am writing to my future self. In the book I write things that I want to do but afraid to do, mistakes I did today that may affect tomorrow or areas that I want to change that will benefit the future me, Honestly it helps me stay focus on doing things for me today because I don’t want to let down the future me.
  • I try to exercise daily and make conscious decisions when eating because the more weight I lose the more I feel good about myself.

Thank you to Erica for pushing through when life knocked you down many times, raising your daughters with respect and love, and making sure that while you are there for others that you keep yourself your priority.  Good luck on your continued blessed journey!



Women’s Month Preview

I enjoy women’s month! It’s one of the biggest traffic months. A lot of people have asked me why do I do the posts for the full month?! Simple, why not give a regular women a month to shine? March is women’s history month and women are changing history on all fronts all the time. These are women who might not have shared their story openly before and are ready to let you know that they survived the very things that was designed to take them out!

Think about it in this light, women need to know that as much division that is created among us, we are all connected. Think about a topic that women alone goes through. Bring that topic up and women who don’t know each other can relate and will openly share. This is why we need to tell our stories more often. We need to talk about the times we succeeded and the times we failed. We need to highlight our strengths as well as our weaknesses. There is a woman somewhere struggling alone when she doesn’t have to. She is somewhere feeling defeated because she doesn’t think what she has done, gotten herself into, or is nervous about, some other woman has been in those trenches, but we have been there and made it out in one way or another.

Ladies it’s our day everyday. It’s our month every month. It’s our year every year but when we get to shine a little brighter, then shine! As a woman I am proud of those who have come before me. I am proud that we as women have failed along the way but still keep on going regardless of what has been thrown our way. I’m proud that women are learning how to embrace what they have and not make excuses or try to water it down. We are owning our place in this world, choosing the life we want, being sexually aware and unashamed and most importantly stepping away from the status quo to achieve any goal we want!

We are scooping up the younger generation and showing by example how it’s done. We are not restricting ourselves to make men feel comfortable. We are walking in lanes that were not always paved for us. We are learning to practice self-care and saying no when we need to. We don’t have to carry it all! We can take breaks! We can travel this world alone! We can work across the aisles! We can make our dreams come true!

I salute all women from every walk in life. From the women who feels as if her past has knocked her out of the running to the women who made every right decision and are benefiting from it! To the college graduate who is the first in her family to the drug addicted mother who cleaned her life up! I salute you all!!

Get ready for some amazing women with some amazing stories to share. Thank you for being brave enough to be vulnerable. It takes a lot to put yourself out there! It takes a lot to know that when you put your story out there knowing there will be some folks who think you aren’t worthy! This blog was made from those whispers and guess what just like you I haven’t stopped! Let’s have some fun, learn some lessons and get inspired to live our best life NOW!

We’re going to hear from business women, community leaders, wives whose husband have left them and they picked up and kept on building, single moms, college graduates, those working with offenders, all kinds of women.  So be on the lookout the month-long celebration will kick off tomorrow and end March 31, 2018!

Women’s Month: Judith M.

As we continue to truck along during this series it will allow us to be able to get the behind the scenes of women in our own community. Today we talked to Judith Dumorney-McDaniel.  She is an Entrepreneur, Philanthropist, and Community Activist who has over 20 years of wide-ranging hands-on-experience in areas of Youth Development, Mentoring, After School, Education, Fundraising and Community Organizing.  She is the Founder and Executive Director of Teenagers in Charge, a non-profit organization establish in 1995.  Their mission is to help teens build their self-esteem, heighten their cultural and community awareness and most importantly provide them resources so they can learn how to take charge of their lives.  She is passionate about serving youth and others see her as a devoted community advocate, educator, and mentor.

She earned her B.A. in English Literature at the University of Pittsburgh and her MBA at Rosemont College.  She is a State Auditor with the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, Department of the Auditor General.  She is also a paid consultant with Episcopal Community Services and facilitates parent workshops and training through DHS’ Parenting Collaborative Workshop Series.  She continues to provide professional development training to a diverse group of adult volunteers, biological and foster parents throughout the city of Philadelphia.

She managed and led teams on many projects.  Mrs. Dumorney-McDaniel assisted individuals and groups learn how to obtain their 501 (c) (3) nonprofit organization as well as hosted informative business-related workshops on entrepreneurship, financial literacy, and mentoring.  She is a consummate charitable volunteer, who believes in “giving back to the community what you took out of it.”

Her civic work and passion with children, youth and families who are homeless and live in foster care extends two decades.  She has worked with the Juvenile Justice Center, Public Health Management Corporation, City of Philadelphia, and other local educational and non-profit organizations.  Other non-profits including providing assistance to Mocha Moms, Inc. Philadelphia Chapter where she served as the former President and is the Charter Founder, a member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc., a non-profit organization committed to public service, an avid parent volunteer at Bodine High School for International Affairs where her daughter attends, and a long-standing volunteer computer instructor at the Haddington Multi Services for Older Adults, Inc.

She is married with one daughter, lives in Overbrook park and worships at Enon Tabernacle Baptist Church where she and her family are members.

Now that is the resume who has given her life not only developing her own skills set to be able to assist but actually does what she says.  Let that be a lesson to other women that no matter how decorated you are, there is something inside of you that you can give to others. Try finding something you are passionate about and use that passion to help others around you.

What would you tell your younger self?

I would tell my younger self to listen to my parents and align myself with positive people who are doing positive things as well as those who share the same morals and values as you. I would also suggest that I get involved in more extra curricular activities and always remember to serve!

What lessons have you learned about life, love, and career so far?

Life is too short! Live everyday as if it were your last. Love yourself unconditionally so that you will appreciate it when someone else shows you the same in return. As for your career, find a passion and turn it into a profit! There is no need to work a 9-5 job if you are unhappy so if and when that is the case-use your job to fund your dream!

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

I hope that I can officially retire in 5 years and then take time out to do whatever I want which is travel and see the world!

What are some of your accomplishments?

I am a wife and mother; I started a nonprofit organization in 1995 that still exists called Teenagers In Charge; I have won numerous awards and citations from the City, State and Congressional level; and I am an author.

How do you feel about the Me Too movement?  How do you plan on using this movement in your family or community?

I honestly have always addressed issues head on with my daughter and as a family so the “Me Too” movement does not apply to me. I try not to really get bogged down with platforms, marches and speeches that have no plan of action beyond the rhetoric! It is frustrating to me when there is NO action beyond the platforms. I personally feel that if we take the time to teach others about how to be proactive rather than reactive after the march takes place; we would see more results. We need more people doing the work and teaching our youth/adults how to take charge of their lives from day one and more importantly, show them the impact of what will happen if they don’t do what needs to be done beyond their cause. This will have more of an impact and that is just my personal opinion.

What are the things on your heart that you look forward to crushing (accomplishing) in the future?

I want to address more issues related to homeless youth as this is my passion. Homeless youth in our country needs to be addressed and I am taking small steps on raising awareness about the issue and using creative platforms to make it happen! I am also looking forward to my book being a best seller!

What are ways that you practice self-love?

I date myself and spend quality time with myself, shop, travel, invest in my personal growth and development. I read daily affirmations out loud.

So with everything you read there are a few take aways:

  1. What are you actively doing in your own life?  She teaches girls how to take control of their life but there are a few adults that need to do the same.  Don’t talk about, be about it.
  2. When you do get your life together, give what you took out.  Don’t forget along your journey there are folks pouring into you.  Do not get big and forget that and give that back in return to someone else.
  3. Your Resume can be whatever you want but make sure while you are doing for others that you find a way to get a passion and find a way even if it’s using your regular job to fund that.  We live in an unhappy world but personal happiness is your job and your job alone.

You can find her on social media:



Teenagers in Charge Facebook

Judith also has a new book out!


About the Author, Judith Dumorney-McDaniel and a little about the book: On January 15th, she celebrated her 50th Birthday! As a gift to herself, she wanted to make sure that she gave away her greatest gift to others because she wanted to leave a legacy and create generational wealth! It is with God’s permission that she presented to some and introduce to others, her first book entitled: Teenagers in Charge-a Blueprint to Unmasking the Greatness in You. The stories shared in this book will serve as a resource and is a rebirth for all teenagers who have had some challenges along the way. Although, it was difficult, these teens conquered it all through their hard work, determination, commitment and dedication. They felt empowered to make a positive change and beat all odds! They chose to redirect the negative energy and made a conscious effort to excel on all aspects of their lives. Some had a mentor and others have not but at the end of the day, they were able to identify their greatest gifts. A special segment in the book highlights young adults who served in a mentor capacity. They had an opportunity to share their own stories on how life was for them as teenagers, how mentoring impacted their lives and how rewarding it was for them to unmask the greatness in others. This book is a blueprint for all teens around the world, who are faced with adversity and have the audacity to be different because they are seeking to secure the greatness in them! 

To pre-order the book for 19.95 you can do so with Paypal

Women’s Month: Who is KJM?

I have had the unique opportunity to come across some really unique blogs over the years. I find that I usually lean more towards the one that tell it like it is.  I am not saying I don’t like the flowery ones for a good read.  However, at the end of the day, I need to hear the black or white and less gray.  So when I came across this blogger it was for personal reasons.  I know the blogger personally but even in knowing her personally her blogs  holds literally no punches.

Blogging can be time-consuming to say the least.  The amount of time even when the inspiration just spills out can take a toll.  There is the actual typing of the blog as well as the editing.  Then just putting your voice out there can be intimidating too. So I wanted to know who is KJM?  What is KJM and what is in the works for KJM.  Kingston Jael Michaels is a blog that was started a little over a year ago.  It is a blog that deals with all kinds of topics but it deals mostly with KJM the author pretty much making fun of herself.  She allows herself to be the butt of her jokes in hopes of helping others.  She says what you want to say but are too afraid and too politically correct to say.  She is just plain old funny.  Find her at http://www.kingtonjaelmichaels.com for more hilariousness.

I asked KJM why she began her blog:

For the last 15 years, I have had people come up to me and ask me to co-write a book with them plus I have been editing other’s works for the last 20 years! Whether it was a school paper, thesis, or just something they were writing for someone special.  I was always humbled by their requests but never gave it a thought until my friend, Michelle Monique Johnson, passed away. She unexpectedly died a week after my 34th birthday and the last thing she said to me way…”it’s time to start your blog! Fly butterfly fly!” And  so my journey began September 2015…her birth month. I write in her honor and I pray I have made her proud!

I think that death can always bring new life.  In my own personal experiences I have seen where bad situations birth such greatness when you are open to itWhen you blog like I said before it allows you to expose yourself in ways that simply can either make or break you.  I remember when others found out I was blogging.  I got mostly good reviews but from family the most that I didn’t even see on a regular basis their critique was much more harsher.  Glad that I didn’t need or rely on the lack of weight their opinion shed.  I wanted to know what she has learned about herself in this process.

 I am naturally raw with my thoughts. And it’s not for shock value! It’s naturally who I am! Through my writing, I become this naked and vulnerable woman…something that is so hard for me to be in everyday life! I always have to be strong for others…and myself. When I’m blogging, I can rest the S on my chest and just be me…insecure at times…vulnerable…yet still strong. And I love that I have discovered that part of myself. Blog life has changed my life forever!
Where is KJM going in the next few years?  What is the vision?
 I pray it grows into a huge EMPIRE and that KINGSTON JAEL MICHAELS becomes a household name…from my books to my television show! Lol. Hey if you don’t aim high and believe in your talents…who will?! So I know first hand the stock I am made of. God-given talent runs through my veins. That talent allows me to transform myself…everyday.
When you blog do you know there are many times where I have written or have deleted a blog by worrying about what my audience thought?  I wanted to know if I was the only blogger who went through this?
When I first launched, I would write and then delete. Hoping to make everything perfect. Truth be told…writing is at its best when it describes imperfect human moments. I was afraid of being judged for my decisions and my views. But then I soon learned that not every day is a great blogging day but that does not mean I should erase the imperfect for it makes me who I am…and I am so in love with who I am and who I am becoming. I am a mess at times but who isn’t? You will get many things from my blog (www.kingstonjaelmichaels.com) but perfection is not one of them!
As a blogger who unites and makes great relationships with other bloggers, who was some of your inspiration?
I follow many bloggers including ToiTime but to be honest my inspiration are writers, producers, and creators of earth shattering controversial books, shows, and movies. Oprah and Shonda Rhimes are two of my greatest inspirations. Black women who build as they create. I am in awe of them! 🙌🏽
What is your message for women.  We all have something that we can take from one another even if we are in different stages than others around us.
Do not be afraid of your God-given talents and never dim your lights for anyone. Shine! Support one another and just be. Lay in all your imperfections and do not erase those moments where you are vulnerable. There is strength in vulnerability. Lastly, love yourselves first…even as you find romantic love. Never leave yourselves behind because…if you cannot count on yourselves….who can you really count on? You are everything! You are beautiful! You are the QUEENS of this earth! Walk in that destiny proudly and never apologize for it! Never apologize for being you.  One Love, KJM
Blogging is beautiful.  However do NOT expect it to go so perfect.  It takes a lot behind the scenes to make things happen.  Never judge another blogger because you as an outsider don’t understand why something is being said in a certain way.  Trust me the writing process is not only a beautiful thing but its therapeutic at the same time.  The way its sad sometimes is necessary to free others as well as the author. KJM keep doing your thing.  I look forward to hearing and reading more from you.
Follow the blog at http://www.kingstonjaelmichaels.com or on twitter @kingston_jael